How To Tell If Your Boyfriend Is That Creepy Guy At The Strip Club
Whether you’re the super chill girlfriend that doesn’t mind your BF going to the strip club with his bros or the kind of girl who tracks your man’s location and bank account to ensure he’s not getting into too much trouble, you’ve probably wondered how your dude acts when he’s unsupervised at the strip club.
Is he the type of guy who gets over-excited after one dance? The type of dude who thinks the strippers actually like him? Or maybe, hopefully, the kind of guy who never feels the need to buy a dance, he just goes to feel like “one of the guys.”
Like, when his crew goes to the strip club, you want your dude to be the Bradley Cooper, not the Zach Galifianakis (no offense, Zach).
Whatever embarrassing shit your man does in the strip club, though, one thing is for sure: you definitely don’t want him to be that guy. You know, that guy that’s just fucking creepy, like too creepy even for a strip club. But, if you don’t throw on a pink wig and follow him to the club, how will you ever know?
We talked to Brooklyn Ford, a dancer at Rick’s Cabaret in NYC, about how to spot the different types of creeps at the strip club, and how to know if you need to bar your man from going out with a wallet full of ones anytime soon.
I know you’re probably thinking, “no, not my guy, he’s so cute and chill,” but c’mon. You know as well as I do that the way a guy acts around you and the way he acts around his friends is totally different. Add strippers to the mix and god only knows.
And crucially, Brooklyn points out that when it comes to guys, being hot doesn’t make them less creepy.
“Creeps come in all shapes and sizes,” Brooklyn confirms. “While one may envision a creep in the strip club as man in a long trench coat with a menacing demeanor, it could be your friendly neighborhood professor or an awkward dad from the Fourth of July BBQ.”
So, if you’ve accepted that your boyfriend, or boo thing, or fuck buddy, is probably being a huge creep while out for his BFF’s bachelor party, now you can hypothesize what type of creep he is. Brooklyn highlighted the six most common types of creeps that attend strip clubs.
Think back to how your boyfriend pursued you when you first met. Did he give you a smoldering glance from across the club and never break eye contact until you were back in his bed? If your boyfriend is the type of bro who “finds what he wants and gets it for himself” and has no etiquette, he might be this type of creep.
“This is not a term that is completely literal,” says Brooklyn. “It best describes the client who follows you around the club with their eyes. This person wont leave you alone until you give them the time of day. They go as far as to ask other dancers, employees, and even customers about you. Sadly, a stalker is even keen to interrupting your conversation with another client to get your attention.”
Why it’s not cool: although guys think “getting what they want” is badass, this quality can often just be a stand-in for a sense of entitlement. Beware this dude, because “getting what he wants” might soon include not just strippers, but also side chicks.
The Guy Who Needs to Tell Every Stripper His Sexual Desires
Have you ever had to scold your man for telling his bros all the details of your sex life? Some dudes give TMI when it comes to talking about their dick and what they do with it.
And Brooklyn says that for some reason, because strippers can be classified as a job in the sex industry, guys think it’s okay to confide in dancers about their deepest sexual desires, apparently.
“These men are not exactly sleazy but are in need of an ear when in comes to speaking about how they enjoy tying their wives up with rope (or any household product) or their love of watching gay porn,” explains Brooklyn. “They seem to move uneasily and create their own strange aura of guilt.”
… Weird. Anyway, if this sounds like your guy, tell him to start a diary instead of forcing a stranger to listen to his fetishes just because she’s named Candy and wears a g-string to work.
Men Who Use A Dancer As A Mental Place Holder For The Nonexistent Girlfriend In Their Life
Okay, if you’re his girlfriend, this hopefully won’t be your man. If it is (i.e., you somehow get a hint that your dude has a “favorite stripper” who he likes to visit periodically), it’s time for you to get a new man.
The Man Who’s Too Scared to Talk — but Not Too Scared to Stare
“He won’t speak to you but he will watch you,” says Brooklyn.
Is your man the brooding silent type? It probably seemed a lot sexier when you were drunk and found him in the quiet corner of the bar than it does when he’s creepily staring at half-naked dancers.
“He resides within the darkest corner, hands in lap, only to observe,” Brooklyn explains. “He watches your every move while squirming disturbingly in his seat like a prepubescent 13-year-old boy.”
Dang, sounds cute.
If you have to worry about what your guy is doing at the strip club, talk to him about it. Instead of snooping around or getting nervous every time he heads out with his bros, have an honest conversation about your concerns.
If he’s the type of guy who’s worth your while, he’ll assure you that you have nothing to worry about and you’ll realize that your man going to the strip club with his guys is just like you watching Magic Mike with your girls… kind of.