Please Donâ€™t Take This Dudeâ€™s Advice to Use Facebook As a Dating App
This morning, I came across an interesting article on the Huffington Post by alleged dating coach David Wright entitled “Why Dating On Facebook Is Better Than Dating On Tinder.”
Immediately I was confused. Last time I checked, Tinder and Facebook were not in the same lane whatsoever. Tinder is a dating app and Facebook is a social media site that we all begrudginglyÂ use to post boring photos and stalk old high school friends that weÂ haven’t seen since 2010.
The author shits on Tinder, saying that everyone’s profile pictures are altered and that there’s no real info besides their photoshopped picsÂ to help you figure outÂ if you’d really get along with that person. He claims that Facebook is a perfect alternative to Tinder because apparently people don’t alter their Facebook photos (sorry bro but they do), and that if you have mutual friends, it means you probably have stuff in common.
But the biggest issue with his theory is thatÂ every girl on Facebook, whether they’re single, taken, or even married, gets random friend requests and/or messages from creepy dudes. And we all hate it. It never ends well. It’s essentially the internet version of cat-calls.
Some girls leave every friend requested unanswered and left to decay in the graveyard of randos. Other girls accept the request ifÂ they have mutual friends. If they make this mistake, they’re probably confronted with a message from said rando about how he thinks he saw her at Bobby’s party that one time or how they’ve never metÂ but he thinks she’s “beautiful” and would love to get to know her over drinks.
Some may argue that these Facebook creeps have courage for making the first move, but I disagree. If you see a girl on Facebook that you want to meet who also has “27 mutual connections,” why don’t you just ask one of your connections to introduce you to her? Get your friend to invite her to a happy hour or a pregame, and introduce yourself to her in person without stalking all her “non-edited” pics or spending three hours to type up the perfect FB message that she’ll probs leave on “read.”
I’ve always argued that Facebook creeps are the worst type of creeps of all social media (Instagram DMs are getting close), and this “relationship coach” has made me understand why. If a relationship coach admits toÂ friending and messaging randos on Facebook, it only makes sense that horny boys living with their mom are doing the same.
Here’s why hitting on women through Facebook is inappropriate: women aren’t on Facebook to look for dates.Â That’s what makes it feel so creepy to us. We’re just going about our business looking at our ex’s new girlfriend like a normal person, when suddenly we have to fend off an unwanted advance from someone who we never wanted to talk to in the first place? Not cool.
This dating coach’s issue isn’t photo editing or women selling themselves differently on Tinder. Those problems are easily solvedÂ by doing a quick Instagram or Facebook background check on your Tinder match. Check out their other profiles before you meet up with them, and you won’t be disappointed.
Instead, it seems like his actual issue is that no one he deems “worthy” is swiping right on him.
The reason Tinder is so successful is that menÂ can’t message womenÂ who haven’tÂ already approved them. If you’re like this dating coach and the only people who are swiping right on youÂ aren’t up to your standards, then sorry pal, but your standards are too high. Take the hint and improve yourself instead of taking your god-awful pickup skills to some unsuspecting woman’s Facebook inbox.