Sorry, But Your Ex Trying To Bang Doesn’t Mean He Wants You Back
“We broke up, but we’re still hooking up.”
It’s a phrase I heard way too often in my last year of college. And I cringed every damn time.
Girls (and occasionally guys too) had been dumped by their previous partner, but had somehow still been convinced to continue fucking them. They said it was because they were “horny” or “bored,” but let’s be real: it’s because you thought there was a chance you two would get back together.
But if he still wants to bang, it means he still thinks your sexy, and likes you at least a little bit, right?
While that’s all true, the fact that your ex booty calls you does not mean he’s ever going to want to get back together. In fact, I’d argue that if you go ahead and hook up with him after a break-up, you’re ruining the chances of you two ever getting back together.
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But let’s get into this without playing into the bull shit excuses guys give you for treating you like shit.
It’s not about him “losing respect” for you, it’s about him being way too lazy to want to be a good boyfriend, but still wanting the perks (namely: sex).
And it’s not just me being preachy. Tons of experts have said flat-out that sleeping with an ex is a horrible idea.
“It’s just a sign you’re not ready to really end this and create a new life for yourself,” explained Dr. Michelle Golland to The Huffington Post. “It’s really unhealthy to lead each other on emotionally.”
Yes, sleeping with an ex could leave to resurfacing feelings, but more likely than not, those feelings are going to be yours and yours alone.
You’re going to end up hooking up with your ex, secretly wanting more, but not saying anything until you’ve chugged seven tequila shots. No matter how convincing your slurred argument is, your ex is going to come up with some bullshit like he “needs to be on his own” or that “things are working so much better right now than when you were together.”
Whatever his excuse, what he really means is, “I like sleeping with you, but I don’t like dating you.”
Getting back together with an ex is bad, but not getting back together with an ex and just fucking him is even worse. No dick is that good or convenient that you should continue letting it into your life. And no schemer is that good at sweet talk that he should be able to convince you that having sex after your break-up is a good idea.
C’mon, you’re better than that.