Why Emo Is Ripe For a Comeback in 2017

January 1st, 2017.

Some people are hitting the gym for the first time in months, some people are clearing out their liquor cabinets, some people are swearing off fuckboys.

But I don’t believe in resolutions. I believe in revolutions. And do you know what is going to happen in 2017 if I have any say in the matter? Emo music is coming back in full force.

Sure, part of this is because I desperately miss the days of getting black X’s drawn on my hand while crowd-surfing to Good Charlotte, but part of this is seriously backed by facts. Emo is ripe for a comeback in 2017. Don’t believe me? Just watch.

1. We Have An Insane Republican President

It’s become increasingly clear that try as we might, Trump isn’t going anywhere. But in between protesting our soon to be president and posting angry Facebook statuses, take a brief look at the bright side.

Creativity tends to bloom under Republican presidents. Sure, it’s probably because we’re all pissed off, upset, and need to unleash our feelings into a painting/song/documentary, but still.

George W. Bush’s presidency was a shit show. But if you’re like me, you were too young and naive during his presidency to know that his presidency was a shit show. Instead, you were busy spending all of your allowance at Ticketmaster and Hot Topic while listening to Cute Is What We Aim For via your iPod Mini.

Emo music seriously flourished under our last Republican president, so let’s make the best of the next four years and at least crowd-surf through the bullshit. Am I right?

2. Band Tees Are Stylish Right Now

Let’s be honest, if Metallica, a thrash metal band from the 80s, is suddenly cool among people as mainstream as Kendall Jenner, anything is possible.

Back in 2007, my classmates looked quizzically at my Boys Like Girls T-shirt and said to me, “no duh boys like girls,” but today I’d probably be an Instagram influencer or something with that swag, right?

If your fave reality star can throw on a Slayer shirt and call it fashion, you can def bring back your old Taking Back Sunday tee and style it up with some fishnets and a choker, just like you did in the good ‘ol days.

3. Instagram Models Are The New Scene Queens

Remember back in the day when you had the luxury of spending over six hours stalking Audrey Kitching and Hanna Beth while AIMing with your boyfriend IWriteSinsNotTragedies666?

While you don’t have as much time to spend on social media these days, that doesn’t mean that you don’t still stalk 2017’s version of the scene queen, a.k.a the Instagram model. They may not wear tutus and fingerless gloves, but they still wear a shitload of makeup, dye their hair cray colors, rock fishnets, and spend a shitload of time taking selfies, so it’s kind of the same thing.

4. Everyone Is Obsessed With The 2000s

Every single band that peaked in the early 2000s is getting back together for some kind of reunion tour these days, and Vans is even hosting a Throwback Warped Tour Cruise for those of us who want to listen to emo music while staring longingly at the sea.

But if you can’t catch one of your old fave bands live, you can always go to your local Emo Night, a party crafted by some kids in LA who really wanted to get drunk (now that they’re all of age) and listen to throwback alternative music.

Even for those who didn’t spend their teenage years following around Warped Tour, everyone is obsessed with the 2000s right now. It’s the reason why everyone is going back to 2000s fashion trends, posting #TBTs on Instagram, and buying “vintage” clothing on Depop.

All we really need is for bands to take their reunion tours one step further and create some new music. I mean sure, it could be a huge letdown, but one good song (like Blink 182’s “Bored To Death”) is better than no new songs, right?

5. We’re All Sick of EDM

After emo music started losing momentum, music junkies started migrating over to EDM. The fuckboys who used to play bass in their mom’s garage were now aspiring Soundcloud DJs cobbling beats together in their mom’s basement.

A perfect example is Sonny Moore, who used to sing for From First To Last. After leaving the band pursue a solo career, he started playing LA clubs as Skrillex in 2008, where he quickly blew up, as did the EDM genre as a whole.

But as EDM grew more popular, it grew more expensive. Seeing a big DJ like Zedd could cost hundreds of dollars, and festivals were even more expensive.

Last spring, Pitchfork published this article on how the EDM bubble burst. And while it doesn’t mean that EDM as a genre is dead, it means that the days of girls in glow-in-the-dark bikinis twerking to Borgore might be slowing down.

In the fashion world, trends cycle from one extreme to the other, and music doesn’t seem to be too far off. Emo kids turned to rave babies back in 2010, and we think it’s time for them to switch back about now.

6. Music Is Progressively Getting Sadder

Happy and sexy songs are great for the club, but sad music is what you really need on a slow Sunday afternoon or a treacherous Monday morning. According to a study, music has been getting increasingly sadder in the last 50 years. Researchers didn’t hypothesize why music has been getting sadder, but we think we know the answer: people want more emo music.

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