Here’s an Emo Sex Playlist Because Sad People Still Bang
Chances are, if you check out a sex playlist on Spotify or 8tracks or whatever, it’s going to be filled with The Weeknd, Trey Songz, and a bunch of other rappers and R&B artists.
But like, what about the emos?
Everyone knows emos like to get down and dirty just as much as the next guy, it’s just that instead of girls tip-toeing on their marble floors in Louboutins, they’re sexing with their vans on.
And naturally, it’s only right if they listen to emo-esque music while tearin’ ass up like they just got married, right? Here are some sensual emo jams to add to your “RAWR XD” playlist.
1. Bewitched – Blood On The Dance Floor
I know what you’re thinking, Blood on The Dance Floor is not exactly emo if you’re a stickler. But, if you haven’t realized by now, I’m a little lax in my definition of emo. And like, what did you want, to bang while listening to Saves The Day? How about no.
Regardless, this song is like p sexual, and not in the way that their other songs literally sing about “splitting your ass in two.” This one is safer to play in the bedroom without worrying you’ll get ghosted.
2. Toxic- Melanie Martinez
Every kid who was once emo eventually got into Melanie Martinez, right? Well, this “Toxic” cover is sensual af. Just try not to belt out the words in the middle of getting head.
3. Scandalous – T. Mills
I’ll be the first to admit I have/had a T. Mills addiction, but you can’t deny that so many of his tracks were prime bangin’ music! Put this shit on and her lipstick will be on your collar before you can say, “cute without the E.”
4. Lover I Don’t Have To Love – Bright Eyes
*moans while getting fingered by a rando dude with knuckle tats*
5. Nobody – School Boy Humor
This is one of those songs that is probs great for making love, not as great for banging a rando you met at a show. But, if you’ve got a bae, serenade her to this ‘lil number.
6. Navigate Me – Cute Is What We Aim For
Most of Cute Is What We Aim For’s songs had a sexual message or allusion in the lyrics, but most of them are too fast and boppy to actually get nasty to – unless you’re trying to have a sing-a-long. This is one of their few songs that’s slow enough to actually grind on top of your bae to until he strips off his skinny jeans.
7. Lollipop – Framing Hanley
There’s a reason why sex playlists are normally full of rap songs, they’re just more sexual than rock songs. But, if you need some gnar while getting slutty, there are covers like this one, which is essentially a rock version of Lil’ Wayne’s “Lollipop.”
8. A Little Death – The Neighbourhood
If you don’t think this song is sexual after listening to it, watch the music video and I guarantee you will.
9. Give You What You Like – Avril Lavigne
Again, I know Avril isn’t “technically” emo. But she was technically every emo girl’s style crush in 2004, so F off, okay? Also, I didn’t even realize this song was on the 50 Shades soundtrack until I looked it up on YouTube, and that’s all the validation I need that this song is supposed to be a boner jam.
10. Come Inside – T. Mills
I’m so sorry for putting another T. Mills song on here, but I’m also not!
11. Bloodstream – Stateless
This is a newer track, but it’s still perfect for all the sad girls trying to get their rocks off with a partner who is the personification of their heroin. #Romantic.
12. Closer – Nine Inch Nails
All the emo boys getting too sensual on this playlist? Try this song on for size. It probably came out before you were even born, but it’s still nice and hardcore for you to make babies too. JK, don’t do that, because I don’t think there’s a daycare tent at Warped Tour.
13. Okay, I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don’t
I’d be lying if I said I haven’t personally tested out the majority of these songs before to ensure that they’re prime for the emo hook-up sesh, and this one’s no different. Well, actually, it’s a little different, because I made out with a total rando while this song played in the background – and it was G-R-E-A-T!
Cover photo by Pompee Raw
Lollipop by Eat Good NYC