Guys Totally Notice These ‘Subtle’ Tricks You Do
Thankfully, most of us have come to our senses and stopped employing the ol’ bend and snap tactic when trying to get a dude’s attention.
Besides, guys clearly realize what you’re doing when you bend over suggestively in front of them to pick up a pen, right?
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Well, yes, probably. And according to men on Reddit, they notice a lot of the other “subtle” things you do too, and most of them don’t necessarily have to do with getting his attention.
No shame in your game, but maybe you should take notes of which things aren’t fooling even the dumbest of dudes. Or, feel free to LOL at the guys who think they know it all.
1. The Bend and Stretch
Doing the bend and snap in a hair salon to impress the mail dude is so 2001 (yes, “Legally Blonde” is that old). The new version is all about squatting and thotting.
“Theres this one girl who’s been chasing the same guy at our gym for months,” says Reddit user Sam_Ghostly. “She always stretches in front of him, she’s really hot, but he’s not interested. I always crack up when she has to stand right in front of him while she tries to touch her toes.”
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Okay, maybe this girl is trying to get this dude’s attention, but maybe she’s just, I don’t know, trying to stretch? People do that at the gym, you know. It’s not really her fault that you can’t help but notice her assets.
2. The Running Water Trick
There’s nothing worse than having to use the bathroom when the only option is one right next to where the dude you’re talking to is sitting. Unfortunately, guys know exactly what you’re doing when you turn on the sink to mask certain sounds…
“Taking a shit but using the fan, faucet, shower, hair dryer, generator, air conditioning, lawn mower, jack hammer, industrial jet engine, cat in heat, and anything else nearby that makes a lot of noise in order to mask it. I know you’re pooping. I’m on to you,” says Reddit user Vandergrif.
That’s unfortunate, but also like, what’s the alternative? Either he hears the actual toilet sounds and knows you’re pooping or he hears the sink running for a long time and knows you’re pooping, might as well run the sink!
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3. The Purse “Trick”
“I know why you’re suddenly taking your purse to the bathroom,” claims Reddit user BullsLawDan. “I know, you know, and we don’t need to talk about it. It’s cool. Just don’t think you’re hiding anything.”
Um…okay, period whisperer. Maybe she’s bringing a tampon to the bathroom, assuming that’s what he’s implying. But maybe she wants to fix her makeup? Or call her friend to have her call her with an “emergency” to get out of this weird date with a guy who’s obsessed with periods?
4. The “Oops I Did It Again”
Playing dumb can def get you out of a traffic ticket, but unfortunately it’s one of those things that doesn’t always work with someone who knows you well — or, if you’ve done it multiple times.
“[It’s not subtle when a girl is] playing cute/dumb when they’ve done something actually pretty shitty,” says Reddit user ddiogenesofsinope. “I’m more tuned to it now.”
5. The Hot Girl Discount
“[It’s not subtle when girls are] trying to get free shit from me because they’re good looking,” says Reddit user senorfresco.
Okay, but, are you sure free shit isn’t the only thing you’re offering women? Because clearly, it might be.
6. The Groupchat Advice Column
This one’s a real kicker. One Reddit user claims to know when girls are updating their friends for advice mid-argument via text.
“You’ve had a reply 0.0001 seconds after me, so why the sudden 2 min gap,” asked Reddit user A_Drunken_Mess. “I’m not dumb.”
7. The Matchmaker
“Trying to secretly set me up with one of their friends,” said Reddit user DrDiarrhea.
Okay, multiple dudes had negative stories about girls trying to set them up, but like, considering how desperate they always are to get laid, why are they so mad?
Take a seat, Dr. Diarrhea.
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8. The “Yikes”
“I was out with my friend for his birthday Saturday night and one of his female friends joined us and she was like, ‘You know what’s sooooo embarrassing? My roommate thinks we should date. She’s always talking about what a cute couple we would make and how we’re basically soulmates.’ She thought she was being slick but it was about as subtle as a brick wall,” said Reddit user Idontknowflycasual.
Here’s a hint: DON’T EVER DO THIS.
9. The DTF Look
Naturally, guys claim to know when a girl is DTF.
“The look on their face when they’ve decided they want you to fuck them but you’re both still at the bar. It’s like they think they have a little secret, but I know they’ve made that choice,” said Reddit user Littlewigum. “It’s written all over them.”
Naturally, this user couldn’t be bothered to actually describe that look, so another bro, Makeshiftjoke, stepped in.
“Subtle smile. Lingering eye contact. She may lean back because the conversation is no longer very important,” he adds. “She might be trying to shut the conversation down so you can call a cab, too.”
This sounds a little more legit, but we’re still wary of any guy who claims to know when a girl is DTF, since most guys think every girl wants them.