BAWSE KITTY’S KORNER: You can’t just go 50/50
Bawse Kitty is a lifestyle contributor who writes about sex, dating, being a woman, and more. This is her column, Kitty’s Korner.
When Drake dropped the video for â€œIâ€™m Upset,â€ (aka â€œ50/50â€) it went viral on all social media platforms.
I saw a few clips on Twitter, and recognized a few faces from a TV show I used to love when I was younger. I had to take a walk memory lane and watch some re-runs ofÂ â€œDegrassi: The Next Generationâ€ (luckily, you can watch every episode on YouTube for free).Â
I took it upon myself to buy a tub of Rum Raisin ice cream and champagne, and then I got busy binging. I really started getting into it during the middle of season 2m when Manny decides she wants to step up her style and take it to the next level.
I feel like a lot of women who watched â€œDegrassiâ€ resonated with Manny at this moment. I personally resonated with Manny not wanting to be considered cute, adorable, or sweet in the eyes of her crush. I didnâ€™t flat iron my hair until freshman year. I was about 14 years old and girls my age had been getting their hair permed and pressed for years at that time.
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I guess some black moms didnâ€™t like to flat iron daily and instead, opted for the braiding route â€“ which was cool until I wanted to become active on the dating scene. I wanted to be hot! Not that braids arenâ€™t hot, but during that era â€“ I needed the straight look. My hair was already long, so flat ironing would just add on to my confidence. I adopted a bow/headband into my everyday wardrobe, and I started to feel a little bit more confident â€“ but, it wasnâ€™t enough.
I went to the mall one weekend, and there was a store called Deliaâ€™s that I had already scoped out in catalogs. I decided on a super tight shirt (that wasnâ€™t necessarily cropped, but showed stomach) and super tight skinny jeans. The following Monday at school, I donned my new fit and I started gaining the attention that I had desired and wanted.
A lot of the upperclassmen started to call me a hoe, even though I wasnâ€™t even having sex yet. But baby, that walk, paired with my new clothes, just made me feel a different way â€“ and it showed. Everyone was hating and â€œslut-shamingâ€ me for no reason, similar to Mannyâ€™s female peers at her high school. She dealt with things similarly to me.
I wasted a lot of time on guys during high school, and I also spent a lot of time defending myself. I still find myself doing that to this day. I really advocate for women, girls, and whomever to do whatever they please, as well as wear whatever makes them feel their best.
On the show, â€œDegrassi,â€ Mannyâ€™s best friend, Emma, started to lowkey judge her off the way she was dressed and the attention she was gaining. Iâ€™ve had friendships where girls judged me on the low for being a dancer or for posting twerk videos, but it all comes down to minding your business â€“ as long as nobody is in harmâ€™s way.
Everybody is different, and I loved how Manny really wanted to push the limit to elevate herself and her look. She didnâ€™t care what anyone had to say â€“ she was looking to be comfortable in her skin by any means necessary.
As the seasons progressed Manny went through a lot of hardships. She was exposed with a nude video leaking, her father called her a slut for wanting to get a boob job, and everyone in her school deemed her a hoe for the way she dressed â€“ yet still, she stayed strong and true to herself.
READ ALSO:Â Bawse Kittyâ€™s Korner: How I Became a Cam Girl
Mannyâ€™s resilience was always very admirable to me. While an outfit shouldnâ€™t be the only way for you to boost your confidence (you can work out, try new clubs in your city, spend time with a baller lol) it is a great analogy to use for the moral of the story.
Say or do whatever it is that you want to try and take yourself to the next level. Donâ€™t be afraid to take risks. People will always have something to say no matter what you do, so just enjoy your life!