Studies Show Playing Hard to Get Basically Works Every Time
When I was in middle school, my mom gave me the best love advice of my life: don’t ever call a boy.
It’s retro and it’s a double standard, but as I would soon learn, it works every. damn. time. Sorry about it.
And a few recent studies confirm that no, it’s not your imagination. When you ignore a guy, it really does make him want you more.
Because boys are dumb and easy to control by doing nothing, I don’t know what else to say to you.
The first study, detailed by Shana Lebowitz at Business Insider, had men go on dates with women who they either selected or were assigned to take out. The women were told to either act uninterested or interested. At the end, the researchers found the men were most interested in seeing women who they’d selected and who’d acted uninterested, because they felt “committed” to their choices, no matter how bored the women had acted.
Also, weirdly, although the men “wanted” these uninterested women, they didn’t necessarily “like” them. Only a man would keep chasing someone he doesn’t actually like.
Meanwhile, in the second study, women were asked to rate men’s Facebook profiles based on whether the men liked them, disliked them, or didn’t know who they were. Women liked the people who were interested in us most, as well as the ones who didn’t know us yet — not the ones who disliked us. Probably because we are normal.
So the moral of the story is if a guy seeks you out and you’re interested in him, you should play it a little aloof. Don’t ever text him first and definitely don’t ever tell him you like him. Yes, it’s old-fashioned to let a guy do all the chasing, but I don’t make the rules and neither does science. Sorry.
