The 7 Stages Of Finding Out Your Dad Is Voting For Trump
When you think of Trump voters, you probably think of uneducated racist people, right? Studies have even shown that the majority of Trump voters are uneducated men.
And yet, your dad, a well-educated and perfectly normal man (or so you thought), is still voting for Trump…WTF?
While it’s thoroughly embarrassing to be spawn of a Trump-supporter, you can’t exactly disown yourself. I mean, your dad still pays your phone bill. So what do you do? Well, here are the stages every ashamed daughter will go through when they realize their father is voting for Trump.
1. Brushing It Off
When your dad first brings up how he “likes the way Trump says what everyone else is thinking” at the dinner table, you brush it off. This is kind of like how he makes those racist jokes about football players or how he points out obese women at restaurants. You figure it’s just one of those inappropriate dad things that he does that it’s too late to change. Besides, Trump obviously won’t win the nomination, and your dad will probably vote for whatever old white man is leading the Republican party this year like he usually does.
2. Shame & Confusion
As more and more studies and polls come out denouncing Trump voters as complete morons, you shudder to think that your own father is one of those voters. You know dads have their clueless moments, but how could your own father be so blind to all the idiocy that surrounds Donald Trump’s failed business ventures and all around bullshit? All you can do is be happy that nobody really has to know about your dad’s political views besides other family members.
3. Trying To Reason
After Donald Trump manages to become the Republican nominee, your worries begin to gain footing. It’s time to actually admit that your dad is a racist, sexist idiot who might be voting for Trump. But you give him the benefit of the doubt. Your dad probably only watches FOX news and doesn’t realize that sites like Breitbart are ridiculously biased. Maybe if you talk to him about what’s really going on from both sides he’ll get it, right? Well…wrong.
4. Getting Pissed The Fuck Off
It’s one thing for your dad to sometimes seem a teensy bit racist, it’s another for your dad to not give a fuck about people in need, but for him to literally not give a fuck about all women? That’s the last straw. Sure, the whole “wives and daughters” argument is annoying af, but doesn’t your dad see that Trump’s views on women apply to the women in his life?! Is your dad a sexist asshole that thinks rape is okay if a woman is dressed provocatively? Would your dad rather see you settle down and be a subservient wife rather than go on to achieve your dream job? Questions like these swarm your mind as you try to figure out how to talk to your dad without getting into a full-blown argument.
5. Wondering If Having a Penis Makes You Immune To Caring About Women
Even if you can get your dad to kind of understand the issues you have with Trump (i.e: pussy grabbing), he somehow claims Hillary is “worse.” Maybe he brings up the email scandals, maybe he doesn’t like Bill, maybe he says she just “seems like a bitch.” Either way, he makes you want to tear your hair the fuck out and denounce all men around the world. Why is it that men don’t give a fuck about anything unless it involves them?
6. Wondering Why Your Mom Chose To Reproduce With Him
You know that your parents met before dating apps opened a whole new world of possibilities, but c’mon, how did your mom end up with a guy like your dad? She’s so nice and like, not a racist asshole? Then again, your parents only dated for a little while before getting engaged, so maybe it was too late by the time she realized that your dad was a bigot? You can’t help but wonder if your dad would be happier if you were a boy.
7. Making Sure You Vote To Cancel His Ass Out
You may live in a different city now, but lord knows that you’ll be casting that absentee ballot in your hometown to cancel out your dad’s Trump-vote. After all, it’s the least you could do.