What To Get Your Booty Call For Christmas
Dating is no longer simple, which means knowing whether or not to get your boo thang a gift during the holiday season is getting more and more complicated.
You wouldn’t normally be thinking of getting some rando one night stand a gift, but maybe you’ve been hooking up consistently with the same dude for some time now. You don’t go on “real” dates, but you still meet up pretty consistently. He’s basically your long term booty call.
So, what to get him? You don’t want to appear too “clingy,” but you also don’t want to look lazy or like you picked up something last minute at CVS.
The perfect gift to get your booty call is actually easy and completely free! Yep, you guessed it, it’s actually a big fat nothing.
You heard me right, you shouldn’t get your booty call jack shit.
Why? Well, let’s think about this here. I mean, you basically give him a special gift every weekend (or every night, if you’re really frisky). He should honestly feel fucking blessed that he gets to have your bod on his occasionally. If anyone should be getting each other gifts in this situation, he should be gifting you, specifically in the form of hundred dollar bills showered on you during sex, or at least a Groupon for the spa.
But let’s be real, he won’t get you anything. Because first off, boys are dumb and ungrateful. Second off, you’re not his girlfriend. And you should never forget that. You don’t have to be nice, or thoughtful, or generous towards him. If he just wants sex, that’s all that he should get. And if you want more than sex, stop hooking up with him and find someone who wants the same things as you.
In the mean time, maybe get yourself a gift this season instead. After all, you’re worth it.