Study Explains Why You Drop Weight When You Start Getting Laid More

It’s no secret that banging, especially a good bang, does wonders for your body. But did you know that on top of burning calories, it can also make you eat less?

The hormone released from your body during a smoosh session, oxytocin (also known as the cuddle hormone), has been found to curb your appetite, according to a new study done by York University. Finally, an explanation for why you tend to lose your appetite when you get a new bae (or just a new jumpoff).

Without acknowledging the scientific side of things for a second, let’s be real about a single girl’s Saturday night. You essentially have two options once it’s closing time, you’re either hitting up a late night pizza spot (or Grubhub), or you’re going home with someone.

Sure, there are occasional times where you go home alone and are so drunk-tired that you pass out before raiding your freezer for something junk-y and eventually stealing your roommate’s chicken nuggets, but it’s rare.

Not to quote Lil Wayne or anything, but when he said “all she eat is dick, she’s on a strict diet,” he was kinda-sorta onto something.

Unfortunately, like all diets, the new fuck-buddy diet only curbs your late night munchies for so long. Eventually, your f*ck buddy could potentially turn into something more serious. Before you know it, you’re getting inviting out to breakfast, and suddenly you’re ordering pizza after the bars together.

Once you guys “define the relationship,” you find yourself eating out together all the time, and quite possibly be eating even worse than when you were single and hitting up dollar slices every night.

Then again, if you continually fall for fuckboys (or fuckgirls) like most of us, maybe your f*ck buddy won’t turn into a significant other and you’ll repeat the cycle and diet all over again. Ending your late nights with a bang is a great way to stop wreaking late night havoc on your body in the form of cheese fries.

If you’re single, this could be a good excuse to have a one night stand and stop waking up next to McDonalds wrappers in your bed, but it’s probably not a solid plan if you’re actually trying to eat better or lose weight. Maybe make a pledge with your BFF to stop letting each other buy pizza after the club, or stop bringing cash out with you. Then again, riding dick is probably way more fun than riding a bike at SoulCycle.

Gimme More Dating

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