Haunting Is When a Dude Who Ghosted Tries To Come Back

Girls and guys both ghost the sh*t out of everybody, there’s no doubt about it. But when it comes to haunting, dudes take the cake.

What’s haunting? You may not know the phrase, which was coined by our friend Michael Rothman, but you’ve definitely been haunted before.

You know when a dude ghosts you and you’re pretty upset about it, but you have a few margaritas, cut your hair, find a new fuck buddy (or three) and get over it. But then, that dude that ghosted you suddenly decides to come back from the fucking dead. Like, excuse me? You’ve already been buried six feet under and now you decide you want to resurrect?

Shit doesn’t work like that man, this isn’t a B-grade horror flick. We already got over you once, maybe made a voodoo doll of you, burned your shit, whatever. We’re not trying to do that again. You can’t just disappear for four months, then send a shirtless Snapchat selfie with the caption “hey stranger” and act like nothing’s wrong.

Haunting will mindfuck you way more than ghosting will, and maybe even more than benching.

A dude who haunts will trick you into thinking that he’s the one who got away, when really he’s the dude who keeps leaving and coming back because he realizes you’re the best he’s ever going to get. But he’s far from the best you’re going to get, in fact he’s probably the worst.

Just know that if a dude disappears out of nowhere without so much as a “G2G” and then tries to hit you up again because he misses you, you can get your revenge and ghost his ass. Seriously, unless he was abducted by ISIS or in a coma, he has no excuse for disappearing and reappearing suddenly.

Now here’s the main point: When a guy haunts you, it means that he ghosted with the thought that he could do better, he realized he couldn’t, and now is seeing if you’re still DTF because no one else wants to bang him. Don’t entertain him for a second, because you’ll probs get sucked back into his BS. Treat him as you would a real ghost, run the f*ck away.

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