Why Shawn Don Loves Girls Who Make The First Move
Rapper Shawn Don is into girls who make the first move, just take a look at his last girlfriend who he met after she slid into his DMs. But he’ll also be the first to admit that he hasn’t always come out victorious when sliding into a chick’s DMs himself.
Dating is tough in the digital age, and Shawn knows all about it first hand. We talked to Shawn about girls who make the first move, if hitting on someone via social media is a cop out, and one mistake that made him feel like a social media creeper.
So many guys love the chase. As a girl, if you make the first move you ruin that little game. What do you think about that?
Totally, I feel like girls think guys are the only pursuer and feel like they should mirror what they say. For instance, if he asks, “how’s your day going?”, she’ll say “oh, it’s good. What about you?” It’s important to have a fine line like, you don’t have to text them as soon as you get their number. You’re better off waiting a little bit. You don’t have to respond back immediately. You can be interesting and authentic. I like the chase, but at the same time I don’t want to play games and bullshit. You know, not knowing where you stand with a girl. Overall, like it’s okay to sometimes hit them up.
What would your reaction be if a girl you just met texted you and asked you “do you wanna fuck?”
That’s kind of tough. That just happened to me with a girl I liked. I thought she was really pretty and she basically hit me with something like that. It was really aggressive and became a big turn off. She was coming on too strong. Even if she’s hot, I’m not interested in that. It feels like I’m not working for it. Also, it just makes guys think, “if you’ll do that to me, are you doing that to other guys?” I’m just going to assume from experience that you’re saying it to everybody.
If a girl sees a guy at the bar that she thinks is interesting, what’s a good excuse to approach a guy so you don’t seem like too forward?
Being casual and authentic. Sending your friend to talk to him for you is definitely cheesy and immature. Just be genuinely straight up with a guy, it’ll go a lot smoother. If you do it that way, we won’t assume some shit is gonna go down. We’ll just get into the conversation, we won’t think about all that. Just be authentic like, “hey, this music’s wack” or “I like your shirt.”
Has a girl ever successfully slid into your DM’s?
Yeah. I dated a girl that slid into my DM’s. It’s kind of funny. More and more people are doing that these days. There’s a bunch of people who meet like that. It’s cool if someone slides in your DM’s as long as they’re not weird. If you’re creative it could definitely work.
What did your ex-girlfriend say when she slid into your DM’s?
When she hit me she sent me a link to a Vine that was a meme gif. It was a black guy on roller skates like trying to slide into a DM. I thought it was funny and that’s how the conversation got started. Then, I said, “can I ask you a serious question?” She said, “what’s that?” Then, I said “how are you so damn fine?” with a funny meme. After, we were just trading memes back and forth. All those one liners work better in social media versus real life.
Do you think a girl should hit on a guy she knows in social media or in person?
I feel that you only have one shot and you really don’t want to fuck it up. So, if you have the opportunity to do it in person it’ll be better because I made that mistake once a couple years ago.
There was this girl that was really cute and I wanted to reach out to her. We had mutual friends and could’ve met up in person, but for some reason I was a pussy. I avoided talking in person. So, I went online and hit her up with a funny phrase and she didn’t respond. Now I can’t talk to her in person and I’m that creeper who tried to hit her up through Twitter.
Not that long ago, I was with a mutual friend who knew I thought she was cute and he said, “Hey! She’s right here. Let me introduce you.” and I said, “No, no, no, no.” I knew she was going to think “Shawn from Twitter/Facebook?” It just messes everything up if you do it online first. In person, they have to respond. Online they can ignore you, but in person they can’t. It made my skin crawl knowing I was that guy. First impressions really matter. There is not second shot after that. The worst thing to do is ask someone “Why didn’t you respond” in person.
What are some places where you don’t think a girl should approach a guy?
When a guy is with his family that could be weird. I think almost anywhere [else] is cool. It’s ballsy to go up and do that so, I respect that. If you’re authentic and just say “what’s up” it can work anywhere. There’s the bar, club, and mall. Anywhere! A guy is never going to be like, an asshole about it. This girl came up to me and said, “I loved your performance! It’s my birthday! Can I twerk on you?” I said “no,” but I still respected the effort. I hung out with her and brought her to my table. It was so ballsy that she did that.
One thing I’ve learned especially getting older is that there are girls that like me and it’s cool and stuff. But I think that communication is an art form that people take for granted. There’s so much more than just “Hey. What’s up?” If you can do it in business, you can do it in relationships and with almost anything. It’s cool texting a guy, but its like okay once you text him and he doesn’t respond, what do you do at that point? That’s like the second biggest problem for girls. It’s like a fucking sales pitch. If they’re not interested in you, you can follow up again, but there’s a way to do it. Ask an open ended question to get them talking. It’s important to look at communication as an art. We live in a “like” generation where we just like a tweet, photo, or something. They don’t know how to communicate. Getting people to open up is such a skill. If you can get a guy to open up and be witty that’ll take you so far with him.