6 Thanksgiving lessons we all learned from Gossip Girl

Any Gossip Girl fan knows that Thanksgiving on the Upper East Side was iconic. Each season provided us with revenge, hints of incest, and elaborate dinner spreads that were left barely touched as the characters filled themselves up on drama alternatively. Bon appetit.

Most importantly, Gossip Girl Thanksgivings gave us totally relevant lessons that we can apply to our own holiday season. With Thanksgiving approaching, here are some things we can take away from the Manhattan elite.

1. If you’re not balancing two guys over Thanksgiving, you’re nobody.
You should either be recovering from a freshly organized threesome or keeping your boyfriend in the dark after having sex with his best friend.

2. Don’t let your ex and your current boo exist in the same room.
Balancing two people doesn’t mean those two people need to meet — especially not on Thanksgiving! Between Alison shading Lily in front of their children, and Dan spilling the beans to Serena’s new boyfriend about her fake sobriety, the main takeaway from Gossip Girl Thanksgiving episodes is this: keep your ex and your current bae apart.

3. Take a break from social media and focus on your family.
Seriously, even Gossip Girl took a break from ruining lives on Thanksgiving. The holidays are about spending time with your loved ones, not remaining immersed in cyber drama. (IRL family drama is an entirely different story).

4. Don’t get hammered.
It leaves everyone around you — be it creepy strangers with a major crush on you or your best friend’s boyfriend — with the task of taking care of you instead of enjoying themselves. At the very least, if you do get trashed, the best way to sober up is a water fight in an expensive bathroom.

5. Don’t date your step-sibling.
While you may not precisely be committing incest, dating a step-sibling guarantees that when things go left, you’ll be trapped sitting across from that person at every future Thanksgiving. Please see Rule #2 for why that could be even more problematic down the line.

6. If you ruin an annual tradition, you might as well be dead to everyone.
Thanksgiving is a holiday people look forward to all year. It is not the time to last-minute ruin your family’s expectations. Therefore, don’t cancel and certainly not to stay in Paris with the family you left your wife and daughter for.

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