The 6 Hookups Every Girl Has After a Break Up
We all know that getting under someone new won’t help us get over our ex. But we all do it anyway, because it’s way easier to give advice than to actually follow it.
Whether it be the day after a bad break up, or a few months later when you realize you’re still not over it, every girl has a little hoe period after a break up. Sure, it doesn’t actually make anything better and sometimes make things worse, but YOLO, right?
Here are all the people you’ll rebound with after a break up.
1. The One You Always Secretly Wanted
This is probably the first person you divert to after getting your heart broken (or breaking a heart, whatevs). It’s that one dude you always secretly wanted to get with, and you told yourself “if I was single, I’d totally get with him, but I’ll stay away so that I don’t tempt myself anymore.”
Well now, you’re single af and ready to hop on that D. So enjoy yourself, but don’t try to make him replace your ex, please?
2. Your Ex’s Friend
There are two reasons you may fuck your ex’s friend. One reason is that you’re kind of immature and passive aggressive and want to give your ex and extra “fuck you” (P.S. this doesn’t work). Another reason may be that your ex simply has a hot ass friend that you always kind of had chemistry with, and when you run into said friend when you’re drunk and single one thing leads to another and you both swear not to tell your ex. Oops.
Anyway, if you don’t want to drive yourself insane, only bang your ex’s BFF if it’s for the second reason.
3. The Guy That Kind Looks Like Your Ex
If you’re not really over your ex, there’s a good chance that you find yourself going for guys that kind of resemble your ex. There’s an even better chance that you’re doing this without realizing it. You’ll have a revelation when you post a pic with your new boo on Insta and your sister asks if you got back together with your ex. Rough.
4. The Bad Boy
Your last nice guy fucked you over, so why not take a walk on the wild side? This will likely happen during the phase where you tell yourself that you “just need dick” and “definitely don’t want a relationship.” You’ll love the bad boy who openly talks about being a fuckboy and in your mind this is great because he doesn’t bullshit. Unfortunately you’ll probably soon find out that you probably wanted more than dick and are now cursing yourself for getting with such an attractive bad-boy type.
5. The Guy-Friend
You’re both lonely, and wine-drunk, and he’s probs always wanted to get with you anyway. You may not get all the way to fucking, but you’ll likely have a steamy make-out sesh before either sobering up and freaking out or being so drunk that you fall asleep on his shoulder. Consider that friendship ruined.
6. The Dating App Rando
After a few months of doing you, you decide it’s time to get laid. You don’t want to tap into the pool of people your ex knows, so you figure you might as well give Bumble, or Tinder, or whatever a shot. If nothing else, at least you’ll get a confidence boost! And who knows, maybe there will be a Tinderella story?
More likely it’ll be an awkward first date that will make you realize you don’t hate the whole “non-date” culture we’ve got going on after all. Welp, can’t say you didn’t try!