Songs for when bae makes you mad AF

Last week, the dude I was hanging out with starting being weird. He was hanging with some other girl who is quite literally the saltiest girl I have ever met — you know, one of those when you can just feel your aura gettin’ dirty by being in their presence? Bae had a decision to make between cake and saltines…. And he chose to take it salty that night.

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You know that feeling when you are driving and you just want some sort of angry anthem to listen to so you can sort out whether or not you should leave his ass in the dust? But then, WHOMP, you can’t find shit to listen to? That’s where I was at…. I mean, you can’t be mad AF and be listening to Ed Sheeran, right?

Well girl, we got your back for when your playlist game is weak. I have created the unicorn playlist of songs to listen to when bae makes you mad AF. Listen to it on Spotify here and check out my Cliff Notes below.

Take it Old School: If you’re like me, you like to drive down Sunset Blvd. and sing lyrics loud AF based on your mood. When boo is misbehavin’, take it old school with En Vogue’s “My Lovin’” and chant along “never never gonna get it,” with your windows rolled down — it really helps if you’re super mad. Also try Destiny’s Child’s “Say My Name,” and the all time obvious fave, TLC’s “No Scrubs.”

Cake vs. Saltines: Let’s face it, if he’s hanging with her, this is less than ideal. Sometimes when he can’t handle the sweetness of your cake — he goes in for that salty-ass single life. For when that happens, try the obvious “Swish Swish” by Katy Perry, or the classic angry bitch anthem of the 90’s, Alanis Morissette’s “You Oughta Know,” or the always fun to sing-along-to, “Bitch” by Meredith Brooks (You know, “I’m a bitch, I’m a lover?”)

When You Want him to Just Apologize: So now you’re considering accepting an apology for whatever idiot thing it was he did — try making him listen to NAWAS’ “Wrong” or Bea Miller’s “Buy Me Diamonds,” since like duh that’s the obvious way to get forgiveness right quick. I mean, I’ve never said no to a pair of Gucci sneaks as an apology, have you? But also, don’t forget your girl Demi Lovato’s “Sorry Not Sorry” for when you decide you were always in the right.

When There Ain’t No Going Back: If you really wanna feel some vengeful vibes without being a mean ass person, try watching Olivia O’Brien’s music video for “RIP”. Girlfriend shows up at her ex-boyfriends’ funeral and takes a bat to his memorial photo, and it’s weirdly satisfying to watch. Also good for this and less mean, HAIM’s “Kept Me Crying” and Camila Cabello’s “Crying in the Club.”




If You Decide to Take Him Back: In the event that you decide that maybe you were a lil’ harsh on him, try Astrid S’s “Such a Boy” and let him know there will be “New Rules” like the ones Dua Lipa sings about. And in the end, listen to “Stay” by Zedd and Alessia Cara so you can hopefully remember all the good things about him, and why you decided to keep him around.

Officially Done: If you’re a mushy one about breaking up, then LANY’s “The Breakup” will likely serve you the best. But if you’re kinda bitter about things, try Billie Eilish’s “Party Favor,” in which she breaks up with her dude via voicemail on his birthday — again, totally satisfying. Or try the even more obvious “This is Me Breaking Up With You,” by Hey Violet.

When You’ve Moved On: If you identify with TSwift and just wanna let him know that this was all his fault, obviously spin “Look What You Made Me Do” on repeat for maximum anger relief. If you happen to accidentally see him with another girl and your new boo and you’re a lil’ sad about it, try FINNEAS’ “I’m in Love Without You.”

When You Miss Him: If shit has gone totally array and totally not as planned, and you’re a big ol’ mess about the sitch, try Hey Violet’s “Hoodie” — which with a title like that, is pretty much self explanatory. Or if you need something more poppy to keep you from crying your eyes out, try Vesperteen’s “What We Could Have Been,” because he’s basically missing out on a LOT now that he ain’t got you around.

When You Remember You Broke Up for a Reason: Everyone always says that people break up for a reason, so if you are one of those who breaks up and gets back together twelve times only to remember that you broke up with him for the same reason ten times ago, spin Halsey’s “Bad at Love.” But then, when you realize he’s just an idiot and will never change, go for Hey Violet’s “Fuqboi.” Then spin DJ Cassidy’s “Honor” a few times and let singer Grace remind you that “Girls like me got too much to offer.” Cuz girl, it’s true.

 

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