Rookie Just Shaded Teen Vogue’s New “Woke” Newsletter

At promptly 3:15 PM this afternoon, Teen Vogue sent out their debut “woke” newsletter which they subtly decided to call “#Wokeletter.”

At 4:06 PM, Rookie sent out their newsletter with the subject line, “On wokeness as a commodity & the branding of social justice.”

Don’t you just love the smell of a fresh subtweet in the afternoon?

READ ALSO: Ivanka Trump Claims She Disagrees With Her Father Behind Closed Doors

Ever since Donald Trump got himself elected president of the United States of We’re Fucked Forever, the number one trend sweeping the nation hasn’t been millennial pink, it’s been being woke. Or at least seeming woke. Tweeting woke things, at the very least.

Some people can pull it off, but just like every fashion trend, it’s not for everybody.

But unless you want to be seen as a Trump-enabler or as tone deaf as Taylor Swift, you have to be woke to have any kind of an influence right now without getting your ass dragged all over the internet.

And the one thing most celebrities and brands want more than anything else is to have some kind of influence on the world – which means everybody’s practically falling over themselves these days to show how woke they are.

Emily Ratajkowski is wearing feminist corset lewks, Selena Gomez probably deleted a video of her and her boyfriend in Italy so it wouldn’t take away from the weight of her meme post about Trump’s immigration policy, and Pepsi, well, we all know what Pepsi did.

READ ALSO: Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi Ad Was Part of a Whole Woke Storyline

And that’s the problem with wokeness being the hottest trend this spring: it doesn’t take long before brands try to capitalize on it to score cool points with you, the consumers.

Like Teen Vogue and their new newsletter which they’ve decided to call “#Wokeletter.”

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And if you think it can’t possibly get any worse after “read and resist,” boy do I have news for you.

“Welcome to Wokeletter!” Teen Vogue’s newsletter began. “Every Friday, Teen Vogue will break down the week’s trending news, politics, and lifestyle stories you need to stay informed, enlighten your friends, and keep the resistance going strong.”

Could they be trying any harder to impress you, the woke consumer, with their recently re-branded newsletter?

Actually, yes, yes they could because the next sentence in that introduction is: “It’s run by me, social media director, Terron Moore.”

The newsletter then goes on to explain why Andrew Jackson is a deceptive male icon and gives you a lot of links about how men don’t like it when women make more money than them in a section emphatically called “#WOKELENS.”

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And then they close the whole thing out with a lot of stories that aren’t remotely woke at all that you might enjoy after all this heavy woke reading, like:

””You’ve been frying an egg wrong this whole time, but I still love you!”
“How much sex are us crazy college kids really HAVING?”
“GOTH ICE CREAM”
and “A recap of all the iPhone 8’s rumored new features.”

Teen Vogue is literally falling over themselves to convince you of how woke they are and even if the lead story for Rookie’s newsletter was already planned days in advance, it’s hard not to read “On wokeness as a commodity & the branding of social justice” as a subtweet to Teen Vogue’s blatant attempt at rebranding themselves as your one stop source for woke news.

Plus, the story it links to — “Discount Activism” — was published on April 14. Usually, newsletters focus on newer stories to draw the leader in. So it looks like Rookie may have led with an older story because it was just too perfect after #WOKELETTER hit every inbox in town.

Because that is what’s going on here, and it’s liable to be a smart marketing choice for them in the long run.

That is, until wokeness stops being the coolest trend and the “#Wokeletter” goes back to being just a regular old newsletter.

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