I find that a lot of Sex Ed is meant to scare us out of having sex, rather than teach us about having healthy, and informed sexual relationships– and the topic of period sex was no different. There’s a lot of misinformation spread about period sex. Whether “it’s dirty” or not is a hotly debated topic, whether you can get pregnant having sex on your period is also a question that gets asked a lot.
“I find that a lot of Sex Ed is meant to scare us out of having sex, rather than teach us about having healthy, and informed sexual relationships.”
When and if this subject came up in your high school sex Ed class, chances are whoever was teaching you just told you YES YOU CAN GET PREGNANT, without taking the time to explain the nuances and circumstances. For this week’s installment of sex re education I’m breaking things up into two sections, one for heterosexual period sex, and one for gay period sex.
Straight Sex On Your Period
Straight sex on your period isn’t dirty, but it can get messy. Depending on what point you are in your cycle, and how your body acts while you’re on your period, you might want to take the proper precautions and lay a towel down on the bed before proceeding. Or you could hop in the shower to make clean up easy. If the mess doesn’t bother you, congratulations. You can go on your merry way and have all the period sex you desire. Pros of period sex include the fact that no matter what you’re pretty much guaranteed to be wet the whole time. Some (okay probably most) men may not want to go down on you while you’re on your period. That’s up to them, but if you use a diva cup, it’s easy to have oral sex with no mess (you can read more about that in the gay period sex section below). And what about pregnancy? Your period is basically your body shedding the lining on your uterus also known as your womb aka everything your body would need to support a pregnancy. The egg that you might be worried about fertilizing, has likely broken apart and disintegrated at this point, so the chances of getting pregnant while having period sex are almost 0. However, know that sperm can stay in your body, alive, for up to five days. Because you usually ovulate in the days directly after your period, you could actually have period sex late in your period, and have your egg fertilized during ovulation once you’re done with all the blood stuff. The only caveat to this is if you’re on birth control. If so, you won’t be ovulating (your birth control prevents you from ovulating) and your period is a result of hormone withdrawal rather than your actual cycle. It is VERY unlikely that you will get pregnant on your period if you also regularly and correctly use the pill. Still, this website says it’s virtually impossible even if you’re off of it. If you want to play it safe, try pulling out or use a condom. It’s best to proceed with caution, but know that your chances are hugely reduced.
Gay Sex on Your Period
Lucky for you, you don’t have to worry about getting pregnant during sex at all so let’s skip to the good stuff. Just like with heterosexual sex, there’s nothing dirty about gay period sex. Yes you can go down on someone who is on their period and not die, but if the blood bothers you just pop in a diva cup (a menstrual cup that collects blood) and you can go down on each other as much as you like without having to deal with blood at all because the cup will be collecting all of it. The only problem now is that if you’re trying to do any sort of penetration you’ll have to take out the cup first. So sadly no fingering and oral sex at the same time (again, unless you don’t care about blood, if you don’t congratulations proceed as you normally would).
“Basically, you can pretty much do whatever you want depending on your level of comfort with blood.”
If you want to skip oral on your period altogether you can always use a strap on, or other toys to stimulate each other. You could try a vibrator or a dildo. Or you could just take this opportunity to try your hand at lesbian anal sex. Basically, you can pretty much do whatever you want depending on your level of comfort with blood (that goes for straight people too!).
So there you have it, period sex myths debunked. Now go have all the messy period sex you like and see for yourself how awesome it can be.
P.S. If you suffer from menstrual cramps, sex on your period is said to be really great at relieving pain and discomfort caused by cramping. Just another reason to have sex on your period– like you needed another one.
Sex (Re)Education is a weekly series in which we debunk myths you learned during sex education back in grade school and high school.
About The Author:
Victoria graduated from Barnard College at Columbia University where she earned her B.A. in Women, Gender, and Sexuality Studies. She spends way too much time contemplating the intersection of Drake and post colonial theory and way too much money on pina coladas. You can follow her on Instagram @marxistbeyonce.
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