8 Instagram Beauty Looks That Would Clearly Never Work IRL
Doin’ it for the ‘gram has really taken on a new life this year.
It affects everything from the food you order (rainbow bagels, please) to the bikinis you rock on the beach.
It also affects the makeup you wear. We’ve all seen beauty “trends” making the rounds that clearly only exist for the purpose of an Instagram photoshoot. Like, there’s no way you’re leaving the house like that – and if you do your makeup is going to be ruined within seconds.
We’ve handpicked some of our fave ridic Instagram makeup trends here. Because you did not wake up like this, and you did not go out like that either.
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1. Colorful Highlighter
Thankfully, everyone’s obsession with purchasing the most ridiculous highlighter they could find has slightly died down – but there are always the laggards.
You know that these crazy rainbow and black highlighters would never ever exist without Instagram, except maybe on Halloween.
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2. Glitter Lips
I was looking for pics of glitter/rhinestone lips, and I found this even more ridiculous glitter tongue. Assuming this isn’t photoshopped (which it doesn’t look like it is), some poor person literally dipped their tongue in glitter and probably still has glitter in their mouth to this day. Ah, the things we do for Instagram likes!
3. A 20-Step Contour
I’m not embedding a video here because I don’t want to shade anyone too hard, but c’mon, guys. Contour was originally meant for stage makeup and drag queens. It’s one thing to dust some strategic bronzer and under-eye concealer on, but an intense AF contour never looks good IRL. Everyone can see the 10 layers of makeup and the deep brown streak on your cheek doesn’t look like razor sharp cheekbones, it looks like makeup.
Even Kim Kardashian’s MUA is over it! Although, if nobody ever sees you IRL, feel free to win them over on Instagram.
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4. Eyelid Art
I’m not saying the people who can turn movie scenes into makeup aren’t impressive, they are, but wouldn’t it be cool if they painted it onto a canvas instead of wasting time and effort brushing it onto a face they’re going to wash in a few hours?
5. Glitter Glued Onto Your Under-Eyes
This looks like it’d almost be a great rave look, if your idea of a fun rave was desperately wishing to scratch your under eye and not being able to for fear of ruining your makeup.
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6. Themed Palettes
Disney Beauty & The Beast Pro Eyeshadow Palette, $48
People do buy these (I think), but the real question is: does anyone actually use them? Or do you just buy them because you’re such a Beauty and the Beast lover that you needed the palette, and then you toss it in a drawer and continue using your trusty Naked palette? That is, of course, after flaunting the palette on your Snapchat and Instagram to make your followers jealous.
7. Nails With Shit Hanging Off Of Them
As someone who consistently has long, pointed talons, I know how annoying it is when people ask “how do you work with those?” The truth is, long nails don’t make it hard to do things once you get use to them, but I’m not sure I can say the same about pierced nails.
Remember when Kim K tried these? Yeah, maybe someone like Kim can rock them because she literally has no need to do anything with her hands – her assistant handles that. But for a normal person? There’s no way. Beauty bloggers def pop these nails on, took some pics, and take them right off. In fact, do they even bother putting them on the other hand?
8. Pom Pom Anything
Speaking of crazy nails, remember that pom pom nail “trend” that sites were writing about? I’m not sure how much of a trend it is, since I never saw a person rocking them IRL, but let’s not pretend that having pom poms on your nails wouldn’t result in some form of fungus growing.
And same goes for any type of pom pom makeup. It’s one thing for a beauty blogger to do it, but it’s another thing when a media outlet tries to call it a “trend.” Like, no, that would mean people are actually wearing this shit out of their houses.
