6 Diets We Tested This Year And Wished We Hadn’t
This year, Galore did a lot in the name of health & wellness — or at least we tested a bunch of diets that seemed sus.
And guess what?
They were all too good to be true, and some of them were even dangerous.
So learn from our mistakes and don’t follow any of these diets in 2017. There are much more healthy ways to lose weight, if that’s a goal of yours, than what we tried.
1. Beyoncé’s Master Cleanse Diet
In order to lose 20 pounds for Beyoncé’s role in “Dreamgirls” in 2006, she gave up food for 10 days in order to drink homemade concoctions of cayenne pepper, lemon juice and maple syrup, otherwise known as the “master cleanse.”
Our writer Iva made it exactly one day into this diet before she fainted during ballet class and got a concussion.
Do not try this one at home, guys.
2. Behati Prinsloo’s Victoria’s Secret Diet
Victoria’s Secret model Behati Prinsloo is the same age as me, doesn’t like to work out as much as other Angels do and smokes, so I figured her diet wouldn’t be that hard.
I was wrong.
Everyday she eats a 6oz package of $8.50 buckwheat cereal, 5 oz of chicken with a raw kale salad, a handful of almonds for a snack, and 6 pieces of tuna/salmon sushi with brown rice for dinner.
That’s it.
Since I’m a vegetarian who can’t afford to spend almost $60 on breakfast, I made a few adjustments to this diet and it made me feel so hungry that sometimes all I could do was lay around on the floor to conserve energy, and one time my vision got blurry and I almost fainted.
3. Kim Kardashian’s Atkins Diet
This year, Kim K revealed that unlike everybody else in America, she was still fucking with the Atkins diet.
As we noted, a typical day on the Atkins diet might include a meat, vegetable and cheese omelet for breakfast, a salad with meats and cheese for lunch, and grilled chicken with non-starchy veggies for dinner.
Basically, it’s a whole lotta cheese, which sounds delicious, but when Ashley tried it, it just gave her a stomachache and didn’t make her lose ANY weight.
4. Bella Hadid’s Diet
Bella Hadid is super skinny, and there’s a reason.
She says it’s because she works out a lot and eats a protein-rich diet, but we know Dr. Passler’s Pure change 7-Day Eating Plan probably has something to do with it too.
Even though the diet lets you eat every two and a half hours, all you have to eat are plan vegetables, protein shakes and fake-chocolate protein bars.
It costs a lot of money and made Ashley lose 12 pounds in 7 days, which is insane and definitely not healthy.
5. The Victoria’s Secret Nutritionist Diet
Even though we all realistically know there’s more to life than looking like a 5’9’’ bombshell who spends her life at the gym and was blessed with the winning combination to the genetic lottery, we all want to look like Victoria’s Secret models.
So after two weeks of following individual model diets, I tried following the diet of a nutritionist who works with Victoria’s Secret models. The distinction was subtle, but it meant I got to eat a lot more meals, and that seemed exciting.
Key word: seemed.
Honestly, I couldn’t make this diet work for me. Not once in seven days.
It made me feel boring, resent egg whites, and doubt every word that comes out of a nutritionist’s mouth.
6. The Cabbage Soup Diet
The cabbage soup diet was popular back in the 1950s and again in the 1980s and requires you to mostly subsist off of cabbage soup for an entire week.
Sure, there’s plenty of room for you to eat vegetables and fruit on a daily basis, but you’re still basically running on empty.
While Ashley did lose about two pounds on the diet, she gained it all back after just one day off the diet.
