Finally, a Product to Fix Your Boyfriend’s Smelly Balls

Walk into a feminine hygiene section of your local drugstore, and you’ll notice a slew of products for women’s hygiene down there.

But, wait, doesn’t the vagina clean itself? Why would we need to buy additional products with scents like “summer breeze” for our lady bits?

Just like you don’t need to wax your eyebrows, or be tan af in the wintertime, you don’t need to use any sort of product to keep your vagina healthy, it’s just like every other marketing ploy in that it convinces you that you need something that you really don’t.

Yes, the vagina smells fishy sometimes, just like your boyfriend’s balls smell like dirty gym socks sometimes. But why do you put pressure on yourself do have a pussy that smells like roses when your boyfriend expects you to suck his dick after a workout?

Enter Nadkins, the personal hygiene wipes for men’s balls, or as they say on their website “jewels.” How lovely! All jokes aside about the punny name, you’re probably secretly excited about these. First guys realized that just like us, they need to do some type of manscaping around their dick. Now, they’re realizing that contrary to what they’ve been thinking this whole time, their dick stanks.

Because consumers, specifically men, want to be reminded of their manliness all the time, this product makes sure they know that they’re not sissies for buying something for their personal hygiene. In fact, Nadkins founder Joe Caccamo admits that baby wipes could work just fine on a dude’s junk, but “baby wipes are for babies, not men.” The wipes are also sold in a “cigarette style” box, because what’s more manly than smoking a stogie with your boys?

In all seriousness, Nadkins does claim to soothe the skin with aloe vera, clear away dead skin with allantoin, and alleviate dry skin with colloidal oatmeal. Plus, a beautiful grapefruit essence that you’re sure to appreciate when your nose is dangerously close to your dude’s sac.

You can purchase Nadkins in a pack of 10 or 30 online, with the convenient option of a monthly subscription for guys who can’t bother to remember to go to the drugstore once a month. On the plus side, if you convince your man to sign up for the subscription, you’ll never have to worry about his stinky dick again. Smelling a grapefruit aroma while sucking dick sounds nice, but I’m still waiting for something that flavors dick like cookie dough.

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