How To Find A Wedding Date When You’re Single AF
Just when you thought you’d finally gotten past all the awkward date functions like prom, sorority date parties, and more, your friends start getting married. And the fact that you have to bring a +1 is drawing even more attention to the fact that you couldn’t be any more single.
There are the obvious choices, like your gay BFF, or there are the totally random choices, like that hot guy you matched with on Tinder who would look great in a tux. Do you play it safe, or YOLO it and bring someone totally random? We spoke with Carmelia Ray, Host of Myx TV’s “Mom vs. Matchmaker” on the potential options for a wedding date when you’re unattached. With 20+ years working in the matchmaking industry, she definitely knows a little bit about how to choose a winner.
1. Your Gay BFF
You should never treat your gay best friend as an accessory, but if you’ve got an awesome gay friend, he’ll make a great wedding date. You can both keep an eye out for the cutest groomsmen and wingman each other. Plus, you probably won’t have to worry about him showing up in an ill-fitting suit or a non-matching tie.
“If you’ve got a male friend who’s gay, he could be an ideal wedding date candidate because there will be zero sexual expectations on his part, other than who you may be able to introduce him to,” suggests Carmelia.
Lastly, unlike every one of your guy friends, he won’t try to grab your ass after he’s had 10 cocktails.
2. The “Big Brother” Guy Friend
The fact that nauseously cute couples are surrounding you in combination with an open bar may tempt you to drink a little more than you normally would (JK you always drink like a savage).
“Consider choosing a date who you know always has your back and acts as your bodyguard, without wanting to take advantage of you,” suggests Carmelia. “We all have that friend who we know we’re safe with (and steps in as damage control when we need it).”
If you plan on turning up, maybe tell your date ahead of time that you’re looking for someone to watch out for you. If he’s not down to babysit, he’ll let you know.
3. That One Guy You Haven’t Seen In Forever
Depending on your age, you might have guy friends from high school or college that you never get to see. If you’re still cool with one of them and he wouldn’t get the wrong idea from you inviting him as your +1, he could be a fun date.
It might seem annoying at first that you have to introduce him to everyone, but it’s way better than taking a dude who’s already fucked all the bridesmaids.
You can use your time together to catch up, or play wing-(wo)man to each other and see if either of you get lucky.
FYI, this doesn’t mean that you should invite your old fuck buddy who ghosted you or that one guy that you used to hook up with. I mean, unless you want to have a shitty time.
4. A Really Hot Guy From Tinder
When you’ve been single for a while, you start to get kind of ballsy and YOLO about things. If you’re feeling like playing wedding-date-roulette, you could always turn to Tinder (or Bumble, or whatever) to see who’s down to be your +1.
Sure, it could be kind of hit or miss, but you at least can guarantee that you’re showing up with a hot-ass date, even if he ends up being really fucking weird.
When my friend was looking for a date for her sorority date party, she set her bio as “send me three reasons why you’d be a great date” and it was basically like she was The Bachelorette, which was fun and ego-boosting.
If you’re worried your date is going to be a dud, you could always meet for coffee first to make sure he’s not psycho. Hey, in The Wedding Date Debra Messing pays an escort to go with her, so as long as you’re not spending dollas on a dude we think it’s fair game.
It’s nice of the bride to give you a +1, but if there’s no one that fits the bill to be your date, there’s no reason to force it. Just tell her that you won’t be needing a +1, and she’d probably be happy to give it to someone else who’s been wanting to take a date.
Even though there are lots of couple-y things at a wedding, there are also going to be tons of singles (hello, have you seen Wedding Crashers?). Don’t let a date weigh you down from meeting all the cute single people that will be at the wedding.
6. The Maybe Date: Your Best Girlfriend
“If you’re a little bit on the shy and timid side, your best wedding date option is your top wing-woman,” suggests Carmelia. “This is the type of date who encourages you to take risks and do the chicken dance rather than being a wallflower.”
While you know that hitting a wedding with your best girlfriend will definitely be a great time, you should confirm your date with the bride before making any promises because this is a controversial choice.
She might be totally cool with it, but if it’s a semi-mutual friend that didn’t make the invite list, it’ll likely rub her the wrong way. To be safe, just ask first rather than having to face Bridezilla when the time comes. In fact, this goes for dudes too. If you’re thinking about bringing someone the bride and groom could have invited but chose not to, they probably didn’t invite that person for a reason.
It’s not your wedding, so it’s always better to see what the deal is before pissing anyone off. If you want things to be a certain way, you can set it up that way once you have your own wedding.