7 Ridiculous Historical Slang Words For Your Vag
Nothing can you turn you off like your partner using a weird name for your vagina during dirty talk.
I mean, imagine if you called your man’s junk a “weiner” mid-foreplay? Probs not the biggest turn-on.
While there are some questionable terms used to describe our pussies these days, they’ve got nothing on what our lady bits were called way back when. The Girlfriend’s Guide To The Vagina has their own vagina thesaurus, and we had a good time lol-ing at the historical names.
Let’s take a walk down memory lane and reminisce about all the lovely terms once used to describe the female genitalia.
1. Quim
According to Urban Dictionary, the word was mainly used in the Victorian era and was specifically used to refer to vaginal fluids during sex. Nice.
“The word may be related to Welsh ‘cwm’ meaning ‘hollow’ or ‘valley,'” according to Urban Dictionary.
Naturally, the word eventually became a phrase used to describe all women and then became a general insult, kind of like “pussy” in America. In fact, in the Avengers movie, Loki calls Black Widow a “mewling quim” which roughly translates to whining c-word, which they definitely got away with because nobody today knows what quim means. Nice.
2. Mumble Peg
Not to be confused with the weird-ass game called mumbly peg in which people throw knives into the ground, mumble peg is a term dating back to the late nineteenth century and into the 1960s, according to Cassell’s Dictionary of Slang. It can either mean the vagina as a whole or more specifically just a woman’s pubic hair.
In some of Shakespeare’s lesser known plays, the word mumble was used as a word for “to have sex with,” according to A Dictionary of Sexual Language and Imagery in Shakespearean and Stuart Literature.
3. Burning Shame
According to A Dictionary of the Underworld: British and American, “burning shame” refers to a lighted candle stuck into the private parts of a woman…WTF?!
4. Crinkum-Crankum
Another word for vagina, according to The Classical Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue. It’s got a nice ring to it, don’t you think?
5. Altar of Venus
Finally, something kind of flattering. This term dates back to 1584 according to Mental Floss, and some publications still use the slang term in their headlines. I mean, c’mon, who wouldn’t click on Gwyneth Paltrow’s Altar of Venus Is Steam Cleaned?
6. Mount Pleasant
Mount Pleasant is a pretty typical name for a town, mountain, etc. There’s one in Charleston, South Carolina and one in New York. But this really comes down to a chicken or the egg type of question. Because the term Mount Pleasant was used in the mid 1700’s to describe a vagina, according to Charleston City Paper. So if your local Mount Pleasant was named after 1700…your city planner had a dirty mind.
7. Tuzzy Muzzy
This term was originally meant to describe a garland of flowers, but then became slang for pussy in the late seventeenth century. Because of its porn-usage, the term became defunct until about the 1940s, when people forgot it had a dirty meaning and started using it again to describe flowers, according to World Wide Words.