There Are 5 Levels of Weed Privilege

You know the struggle: having to sneak past your parents into a special outdoor hiding place just to smoke. You think it’s all good, then you get stoned, come back inside, bump into a flower pot, tell it you’re soooo sorry, accidentally make eye contact with your mom and she knows exactly wtf is going on.

You have little to no weed privilege.

Your living situation, access to a dealer, the quality of the weed you can get and how often you smoke are all contributing factors to your weed privilege level.

Smoking weed in itself is a privilege, especially when more than half of the arrests made in the U.S. are pot-related. But it gets even more complicated than that. Here are the respective levels of weed privilege.

Living at home with no car

This is about as bad as things get. Not only are you pretty much stranded (unless you live in a city with public transportation), but you can’t even drive to go meet your dealer. And the quality of weed that you’r probs smoking is the equivalent of pencil shavings if you’re living in suburbia.

All of your pot paraphernalia, meaning like papers or bong, has to stay hidden at all times. Or, because you can’t have any smoking implements, you smoke out of those jank DIY bongs. Your smoke spots are probably all of the places that your parents can’t find you, and having to deal with that leaves you paranoid. All. The. Time.

The worst about living with your parents is in order to go outside and smoke at night, you have to get past them or whatever security system they have. And this sucks, but remember, at least you have a bed to sleep on.

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Living at home, but you have a car

Living at home with your ‘rents can be tough, but at least you have an escape route: your car.

Even though your parents might hover too much, you can get out and drive in circles around your neighborhood to smoke. Some of my fondest memories are when my friends and I used to pack into a car and hotbox. Despite wishing my conditions were better (meaning wishing I lived alone), a car does give you a space to call your own, even if you own 70 air fresheners to cover the smell.

Another privilege is that you can drive to the dealer, which eliminates awkward run-ins with your parents when you’re in the middle of picking up.

Living with roommates

So things aren’t too bad, but they could be better. Living with roommates can be either the most dope thing ever, or the worst. More often than not, you’ll likely have to deal with some judgement from one of them about your ganja habits. But really, who gives a fuck. You pay rent too.

And dealing with judgement from your roommates is some how easier to manage than when it’s coming from your parents.

The best case scenario for living with roommates is that they are also stoners. You don’t have to worry about coming into your house reeking of pot because no one cares, they all probs smell like it too. You guys all share the same dealer, they sell good shit too. The best part though is whenever you run out of bud, you don’t have to fret! Your roommates have you covered.

The only risks you really have to deal with are annoying landlords or neighbors who are annoyed with the smell.

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Living alone in apartment

This is basically the best option you can hope for. The only person you have to worry about judging you is yourself, and especially if you live in a chill apartment building without that annoying landlord or neighbor, it’s a no worries oasis.

You can also leave your things everywhere without having to worry about parents walking in. Your dealer has literally everything you might need, and he sells A+ stuff. You’re probably the closest thing to a weed sommelier, and the dealer probs comes straight to your pad to smoke you out.

Living the stoner life in your own pad is pretty sweet, and the only thing that would make your set up any better would be if Congress would get its shit together and legalize pot everywhere (so you didn’t have to worry about the illegal aspect).

Living in Colorado

This goes for anyone living in a state where weed is legal: YOU ARE PRIVILEGED.

And therefore, you should check it. You might have any or all of the problems above, but at least you can’t get arrested for possession or partaking in public. Your parents can’t even tell you to stop doing it because it’s not illegal (that is if you’re of age).

You get the best of life.

Gimme More POP

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