Twin Peaks Fashion Is About to Have a Major Moment
After three long ass years of hype, Twin Peaks is finally coming back this Sunday.
It feels a little surreal, which is fitting seeing as Twin Peaks itself is more than a little surreal.
Anyway, regardless of whether hardcore fans think the new season is all that and a bag of chips or a hot flaming bag of piss, Twin Peaks fashion is about to be EVERYWHERE.
Vogue’s gonna write about it, Teen Vogue’s gonna write about it, and the list could â€“ and will â€“ go on and on and on.
So before you get theÂ wrongÂ idea of what Twin Peaks fashion looks like, why don’t you let us tell you how it’sÂ reallyÂ done.
Ladies, get our your pencils â€“ unless you have a voice-activated recorder like Special Agent Cooper, in which case, say hello to Diane for us.
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The Pacific Northwest is chilly af. In Twin Peaks, there’s a sweater for every occasion.
Whether you wanna look pouty:
or thotty n naughty:
No matter what the message, you’llÂ say it even better if you’re wearing a sweater.
If you like those sweaters, you’ll want to buy this oneÂ here.
Nothing says, “Hi, I’m from a podunk town where people like to secretly run around killing each other and pimping out girls to be straight up prostitutes,” like a hearty dose of plaid in your sartorial diet.
This includes plaid shirts:
and even plaid bathrobes:
Matching gun and dumbass boyfriend sold separately.
Buy yourself this dope ass plaid shirtÂ here.
Red is a the kind of color that stops you in your tracks and makes you think, “whoa, I might get killed tomorrow.”
And it looks great on everybody whether it be femme fatales:
Or short guys who might just be figments of your imagination:
And TBH if you accidentally get blood all over yourself, it’ll be way easier to get away with.
Buy this bombshell-esque red dressÂ here.
Seriously. This is a secretly seedy town so the ladies need to really walk on the wild side when they strip down and reveal their true natures.
Buy some thotty lingerie here.
Frills are a little bit tacky, but a great way to dress up for another donut-filled day inÂ Murderville, USA.
Stay classy, Twin Peaks.
Buy some frilly stuff here.