Which Sex And The City character are you based on your sex toy preference?
There’s bizarre, meant-to-be-a-joke character quizzes, and then there’s extremely telling character quizzes.
This is one of those telling ones.
As we all know, “Sex and the City” is a cult favorite TV show that, as problematic as it may be, is very liberating and inspiring in many ways. “Sex and the City” is the show that inspired me to start making the first move, to be confident in my own skin, and to buy my very first sex toy.
I know many women that credit their sexual liberation to the show, because, at the time, it was ground breaking for women who enjoyed sex. Prior to “Sex and the City,” there wasn’t really a show whose female characters talked about sex so casually and openly (like at a Sunday brunch).
Again, as problematic as “Sex and the City” may be (i.e. no non-stereotypical actors of color, stereotypical LGBTQ characters, and yknow, much, much more), it can still be seen as a great example for women who are looking to feel comfortable in being sexually empowered.
Now, since “Sex and the City” prompted me to buy my very first sex toy, I got to thinking: did I buy a mini, pink vibrator first because I was timid? Or, did I simply buy that because that’s what Carrie would have purchased?
🐰#CRUCIAL ACC-SEX-ORY🐰May is #NationalMasturbationMonth and we would be remiss if we didn’t mention the landmark “rabbit” episode, which not only validated female masturbation but also normalized sex toys for an entire generation of women. And although we will never understand the appeal of sex toys that are shaped like woodland creatures, not to mention the bizarre faux pearls, the rabbit remains an timeless icon to this day. (S1/EP9) #CarrieBradshaw #CrucialAccessory #Rabbit #SelfLove #HitachiTho
But seriously, viewers usually find themselves relating to one or two characters specifically on the show, rather than all four. I always felt I was a Carrie and a Samantha. I wondered – what “Sex and the City” character was I based on my sex toy preference? (Yes, I’m purposefully writing like Carrie, let me live my journalistic dream).
So, here goes. This article is for all the girls who swear they’re a Carrie AND a Miranda – most likely, you are actually just one after you take this quiz.
Carrie doesn’t often talk about sex toys, even throughout a 6(.5) season run. But, it’s safe to assume she dabbles in your regular, vanilla toys every now and then (especially during that post-Big breakup that was pre-Aidan). For Carrie, she most likely uses a small, easy to conceal, cutesy vibrator similar to this one from Love Honey.
It’s also probable that Carrie is really into using toys that involve her and her partner. Carrie is all about believing in love (even though she’s sometimes a cynic), and is obviously very big (haha) on relationships and intimacy. Another option for Carrie would be the We Vibe – it’s a vibrator that you or your partner can control via a remote or an app.
Carrie would love this shit. And if you do, too, then you’re the Carrie of the group.
Another great option (a runner up) would be these fuzzy shoes that she once tried, but admittedly, with the wrong man (fucking Berger).
✨MARABOU MOMENT✨We really need a @JeffreyCampbell shoe collab so we can recreate all of these crucial D&G accessories from Season 1. Seriously @JeffreyCampbell, the children are thirsting for marabou slingbacks and we know that you have the budget for a little viral marketing. Can everyone reading this pls @ them? Because if we don’t have those fluffy mules come Spring we are going to pop the fuck off (S1/EP5) #EveryOutfitxJC #DolceandGabbana #JefferyCampbell #BoudoirLook
The trickiest of them all is Charlotte, mainly because she’s quite shy about being open with others about sex. But, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t get her freak on in the sheets! But, think bougie freak in the sheets. Because Charlotte only goes big or goes home.
For Charlotte, there are two really good options. Option one would be (duh) a fancy shmancey slip to wear to bed, like this one from Agent Provocateur – there’s even a scene of her wearing something similar to bed with Trey, if you recall. The second option would be this chandelier face mask from Agent Provocateur, because Charlotte is extra af.
🕷GOTHIC BOUDOIR MOMENT🕷 Charlotte’s brief foray into the land of trashy lingerie is fucking iconic. She looks hot as hell here. But sadly her efforts are lost on Trey, who suffers from erectile dysfunction yet makes no outside effort to sexually satisfy his wife. Unable to comprehend sexuality outside of the physical confines of his flaccid penis and the mental confines of his madonna / whore complex, Trey doesn’t even bother to offer Charlotte a handjob. Her sheer Betsey Johnson-esque négligée, no doubt purchased at Fantasy World, is completely wasted on this loser (S3/EP16) #CharlotteYork #BoudoirLook #CharlottesNonBasicSexuality
Sex toys, for Charlotte, aren’t about the stimulation – they are about helping her feel sexy and confident in bed, which these options would absolutely do. Charlotte is all about, similar to Carrie, the relationship and the intimacy. The slip and face mask are awesome choices for exactly this. If this seems like you, you’re a Charlotte all the way.
Samantha would honestly probably use every sex toy imaginable if prompted, but this is about preference. We know for a fact that her favorite sex toy is her giant ass wand (we know this because of the fact that she eventually broke it from overuse). Legend has it that The Magic Wand is the vibrator to end all vibrators – nothing but the best for our dear Sam.
Samantha also really enjoys using food during sex, such as sushi or whipped cream, and we know she loves a unique piece of lingerie. This insane playsuit from Agent Provocateur would certainly do the trick, as Samantha is really into exploring new things (i.e. sex swing) and definitely goes for a shock value in the bedroom. Can’t imagine a dude expecting her showing up in that.
On top of this, Samantha always seems to be wearing expensive jewelry during the act, and she never shows up unprepared. Samantha is also always down for a nice glass of Veuve or a hit of some top shelf weed before sex. It’s also fair to say that Samantha is into role playing, so, if you’re into dressing up, you’re a Samantha.
Miranda’s sex toy preference in awesome in its simplicity: The Rabbit. Oh, The Rabbit. A classic choice, just like Miranda. As we know, once Miranda finds The Rabbit on her random sex shop run, she never goes back. In fact, she keeps it right in her bedside drawer, not packed away in a “maybe I’ll use this random sex toy one day” box in the back of her closet.
That’s true love right there.
Aside from this, I feel like Miranda is really down to try some butt stuff. Meaning, I’m willing to assume she would peg. So, we think Miranda would be really into testing out this strap on from Love Honey. Miranda even heavily questions Samantha after her first strap on adventure.
She’s also all about doing it yourself if no one else is around to help, so, as she said, battery operated devices are a big “go.”
Miranda is practical af, so anything that’s efficient or anything that makes an orgasm easier/faster, she’s into. If you like to get things done quickly, you’re a Miranda 100%.
Side note: It’s oddly difficult finding any GIF or still of Miranda’s more sexual moments, which, to me, is super lame. Just because she’s Miranda doesn’t mean she’s not sexual af!
5. Bonus – Stanford
Stanford, of course, would be very similar to Carrie in his sex toy choices. They’re both extra as hell and I feel like Stanford wants his toys to match his personality.
So, for Stanford, my first choice would be this hot pink butt plug. It has to be hot pink though, otherwise it’s not very Stanford of him. As an addition, some really expensive lube would definitely be in his drawer – like this one from Love Honey.
And, obviously Stanford would buy the male version of The Rabbit – aka, The Rabbit, but as a cock ring. And yes, this would have to be hot pink, too.
Don’t forget, Stanford’s sex is also most likely followed by a cigarette or two, and probably a martini.
Check out @everyoutfitonsatc for more “Sex And The City” memes!