Kylie Jenner’s 19th Birthday Live Blog: Everything You Need To Know
Today is Kylie Jenner’s 19th Birthday. It’s an important day. So we’re gonna keep you updated on everything that happens as it happens. And because it’s my birthday too, I’m going to update you on what I’m doing too because I don’t get enough attention from my own friends.
7 PM LAST NIGHT:
Kylie Jenner died her hair red and braided it into cornrows. Either that or she’s wearing a really good wig.
Us Weekly, Teen Vogue, the Daily Mail and 16 other news sources have already written about it.
I on the other hand wore my hair down and said something self-deprecating about it.
Galore is the only news source to cover it.
August 10, 10:05 AM
Kylie Jenner’s actual birthday is starting off with a bang. First, she posts a video of herself soaking up the love from her adoring friends while they sing happy birthday to her.
And then she posted a picture where she’s wearing a low-cut red swimsuit with what appears to be black fur slides.
A photo posted by King Kylie (@kyliejenner) on
She looks moody, which I can understand. Birthdays can be tough. Especially when you’re home alone with nobody to keep your company in your sexy swimwear.
Meanwhile, my mom sent me an e-mail of her “singing to me.”
And I took a picture of myself in MY black fur slides and the slightly less sexy outfit I’m currently wearing.
Don’t you just want to ravish me?
10:30 AM
Kylie spent some quality time pretending like she was a puppy dog on Snapchat while getting her hair braided and listening to one of Tyga’s better songs, “Senile.”
She also reminded everybody that today was the last day to buy her special, limited edition lip kit.
A.K.A. she reminded everybody that it’s her birthday and even though she didn’t get you anything for yours, if you could throw her some dollars that would be much appreciated.
I plucked a white hair out of my right eyebrow.
And ate a salad from yesterday.
4:37 PM
Kylie is at the beach. Or maybe she’s on a private island. Whatever. Either way, she’s feeling blessed and wearing multiple body chains.
I am about to take a shower.
It’s almost the same, right?
Right?
Check back for more updates.
