Justin Bieber Buzzed Off His Dreads — Because of Anna Wintour?
After 28 days, Justin Bieber has finally answered our prayers and buzzed off his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad white boy dreads.
While the reasons behind his new hair transformation remain unknown, we’d love to believe it had something to do with tonight’s Met Gala, a.k.a. the number one fashion night of the year, because you know there’s no way Anna Wintour would EVER let Justin get away with pulling that shit on her red carpet.
We’re guessing she dealt the news to him over a phone call that went something like this:
Justin: Hey Anna, I’m so glad you called. I’m so excited for Monday night —
Anna: Look Justin, I don’t have a lot of time, so I’m just going to come out and say it: we need to talk about your hair.
Justin: I’m so glad you noticed, I love my hair —
Anna: Your hair is ugly, it makes you look ugly, and I can’t have anything ugly walk down my red carpet, do you understand?
Justin: Wait, what?
Anna: Buzz it off or you can’t sit with us on Monday night, period.
Justin: But —
Anna: End of discussion. You have 48 hours, Justin.
(Anna hangs up the phone and Justin Bieber immediately bursts into a puddle of tears.)
We knew there was a reason we loved her.
