Disney Decided to Ruin Your Favorite 90s Christina Aguilera Song
Remember back in the 90s when all the baby pop stars like Britney Spears, *NYSNC, and Christina Aguilera had all these seemingly innocent songs that were not-so-secretly dripping with sexual over/undertones?Â
You do? Cool.
So the good news is, Disney does too. The bad news is they want to ruin it with sanitized, G-rated covers.Â
Meet Dove Cameron.
A photo posted by â™¡DOVEâ™¡ (@dovecameron) on
She’s 20 years old, mildly adorable, and she’s been on Disney’s payroll since 2012 when they cast her in some show about identical twins calledÂ Liv and Maddie. Â
Now that’s she’s grown, Dove wants to be a pop star so Disney thoughtÂ she’d be the prefect person to remake Christina Aguilera’s 1999 classic “you’re hot but I’m not gonna f*ck you unless I’m feeling it” anthem “Genie In a Bottle,” only minus all the sex.
How does that work?
By setting the song in some magical Game Of Thrones-esque fantasy land andÂ changingÂ most of the lyrics.
Here’s an example:
Christinaâ€™s OG lyrics were,Â â€œYouâ€™re lickin’ your lips / and blowing kisses my way / but that donâ€™t mean / Iâ€™m gonna give it away.â€
Hereâ€™s what Disney made Dove sing:
â€œYouâ€™re making a rainbow / blowing kisses my way / but that donâ€™t mean / Iâ€™m going to hear what you say.”
Umm WTF does making a rainbow mean? Is Dove’s boy toy a wizard? Or better yet, is he aÂ leprechaun because even though those boys are short and hairy, a little pot of gold never hurt nobody if you get our jist.
Watch Dove’s hopelessly G-reated version below, and then treat yourself by watching Christina’s OG bad girl production to watch how it’sÂ reallyÂ done.