9 Types of People to Cut From Your Life in 2017
Moving from one year to the next supercharges us. It’s a time for setting resolutions and resetting your space so that you enter the new year sans baggage. New year, new you, right?
In the spirit of cleaning house, New Year’s is also a time to reevaluate what worked and didn’t in 2016, friendships included. Here are some of the people you might want to consider a part of your past.
1. The Chronic Victim.
This person is constantly in a state of crisis and it is never a result of their own wrongdoing. They think they are just misfortunate when in reality, they have zero sense of responsibility and thrive on drama. You might exhaust hours of emotional labor on maintaining this friendship, including late night calls and post-meltdown meetups, but there’s little to no reciprocity. Ditch ’em.
2. The Slut Shamer.
In 2016, it is a shock to me that people fail to understand why slut-shaming is wrong. Mysteriously, some people still manage to be huge assholes when it comes to the clothing you wear and your personal sexual decisions. Any friend who tells you the way you dress is attention-seeking or likens your self-respect to how many people you’ve slept with can get left behind.
3. The Fake-Activist.
Feminism and gender/racial justice have finally been at the forefront this year and while I’m here for it, it invites a lot of people to wear the costume of activism online without putting in the actual work IRL. This is like the white girl who shares posts against racial injustice but then nods in agreement when her best friend hates N-words. Activism that is only performative isn’t real activism.
4. The Guy Friend Who Not-So-Secretly Wants To Bone You.
This is the guy friend who professes to appreciate your friendship but comments on how hot your body is 24/7. He’ll probably make a move on you if you’re ever drunk and vulnerable, or at the very least complain that you friend-zoned him in a few months. Why not devote your friendship to men who are genuinely interested in being platonic with you?
5. The Unsupportive Friend.
This is the friend who has literally no idea what you do for a living, what any of your interests are, or what you do in your spare time. They ask zero questions about your life but answer your questions with word vomit. This friendship is shallow, at best, and it’s probably only hinged on your willingness to text back quickly.
6. The Chronic Canceller.
You make plans with this person and only 15% of you expects them to even show up. When they do show up, it’s celebrated because it’s that infrequent. After a while, this kind of friendship is tiring. Sometimes you just need a person who’ll show the fuck up.
7. The Hyper-Sensitive Friend.
While I love friends who are emotionally up-front, it’s exhausting having to constantly tiptoe around someone’s feelings. I’m talking about the friend who is angry because you guys hung out only sixteen hours instead of the usual eighteen that week and now she’s upset you don’t have time for her anymore. Constantly arguing with someone about your devotion to the friendship can just indicate a severe difference in core values, and that’s fine, but you may not necessarily need to keep that energy active in your life.
8. The Friend Who Hates “Political Correctness” And Therefore Doesn’t Filter 80% Of The Offensive Things She Wants To Say.
You’ve told them a million times that they’re offensive AF. With a laugh, he/she tells you, “I just think you’re too focused on being politically correct.” This is the kind of person who says, “I just don’t understand why black people can say it but I can’t.” This person is a verbal terrorist. They don’t care that their words have real life consequences and hate being held accountable. Do you honestly need a friend who doesn’t mind offending you?
9. The Friend Who Makes You Pick Sides.
This applies to a situation where you used to be a trio and now, you feel like a child of divorce. Someone asking you to pick their side over another friend’s is showing you how true they are, which is not very. Your friendship isn’t valued by how much you hate the people they hate.