5 Best Moments From The American Horror Story Premiere

With Halloween just around the corner, it was only appropriate that American Horror Story premiered last night. As usual, AHS did its usual duty of giving us the creeps and possibly refusing to turn the lights off when we headed to bed last night. C’mon, did you see that clown?! Like that crazy ex boyfriend we’ll never get over, AHS did its usual job of enabling us to feel opposing emotions within minutes. For most of us (including myself), that clown scene was extremely disturbing. But, you would be lying if you didn’t get a little turned on by the naughty scene involving Evan Peters’ character and his “special” hands. Here, we re-cap our top 5 favorite moments from last night’s episode of AHS.

1. The Clown’s Bloody Murder:


As someone who has never been afraid of clowns, I can only imagine what someone who’s terrified of clowns thought about this scene. It was truly horrifying. I am pretty sure I won’t be able to set foot in a circus again without getting the chills.

2. Evan Peters’ sex scene:


Who knew we could be turned on by freaks? Wait, just kidding… I always knew that. Maybe we could all use a little creativity like lobster boy in our sex lives.

3. Jessica Lange’s cover of “Life on Mars:”


Maybe the Glee cast that attended the AHS launch party were a hint to this? Who knew we would be treated to some great music in between murderous killing sprees! Although technically David Bowie doesn’t fall into the intended time period of the show, we love the sweet irony that Elsa Mars was singing “Life on Mars.”

4. Keeping Killing in the Family:


Well, the next time your parents want to complain about your current/past teen angst, you can kindly remind them that Bette stabbed her mother to death because she couldn’t go to the movies. Even better, Dot (her siamese twin) decides to stab Bette in her anger as well, which is essentially like stabbing herself.

5. Orgies and Opium:


Okay, who doesn’t love a good orgy? Or at least watching one? Maybe it would have been a bit more enjoyable if not for the screeching soundtrack and slew of slightly disfigured participants, but AHS keeps is creepy and sexy for us as usual. To top it off, filming said orgies is always a terrible idea.


Needless to say, we are even more excited for the rest of the American Horror Story season to commence. We’ll just be sitting here, checking over our shoulder to make sure there are no murderous clowns while simultaneously searching for our own “lobster boy” to fulfill our needs.

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