In 2007, the most educational program to ever grace America’s airwaves came into being, influencing a generation of women to grow up to be fabulous, fearless, and bitchy as fuck.
That show was The Simple Life, and its premise was simple: watch two rich socialites, Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, as they hilariously struggle to be competent in easy, low-paying manual jobs.
Somehow though, even though Paris and Nicole did a horrible job with every task the television producers put in front of them, they still managed to teach their viewers a lot.
Here are 24 timeless and invaluable lessons from The Simple Life vault.
1. There’s a lot of fish in the sea, and most of them are gross af
2. Sex appeal is a girl’s best friend
3. It’s always okay to ask for help when you need it.
4. Never let an opportunity for self-improvement pass you by.
5. Once you live in LA, you’ll think every other place is a rotting hell hole.
6. Never settle for anything less than you deserve.
7. Make up is your friend.
8. Everything comes back to strippers.
9. Size matters.
10. Well-behaved women seldom make history.
11. It’s always a good time to put a fuckboy in his place.
12. You don’t need to buy a whip and a ball gag to keep things spicy in the bedroom.
13. There’s nothing more powerful than a well-aimed crotch shot.
14. If he’s wearing a visor, he’s gonna be too much of a pussy to make the first move.
15. Men like talking to girls with big boobs.
16. You always have to believe in yourself, because the haters are everywhere.
17. Being a sexy bitch is a full time job.
18. Actions speak louder than words.
19. Sometimes less is more.
20. Cooking is not for everybody.
21. There’s no excuse for being boring.
22. Diamonds are a girl’s best friend.
23. When in doubt, twerk it out.
24. Shit happens.
Don’t you feel more educated now?
About The Author: Maria Pasquini
Maria Pasquini writes about celebrities and makes a lot of jokes. Hopefully you find some of them funny. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter.
A poet, a screenwriter, an actor, a model, a scholar, and a fashion designer, Sejahari Saulter-Vilegas is a Black-Mexican multidisciplinary artist from Chicago. He is the master of his narrative and a voice for our generation, always aiming to nuance social commentary through various artistic outlets. Apart from being to express himself in multiple ways,
La sensación española BadGyal impacta la industria musical internacional con su nuevo sencillo “Blin Blin”, en colaboración con el exponente del momento, Juanka. El sencillo ha sido producido por El Guincho junto a Star Boy y Jasper Harris. “Estoy muy contenta de haber colaborado con Juanka en esta canción y estoy segura de que a los fans les
Jordan Allen is an emerging, self-taught artist that is originally from St. Paul, Minnesota. Based in New York since 2017, Allen’s practice explores existential questions as a means of searching for his own truth and identity. His upbringing as the single male in a a single mother household, and his experiences as a Black man
Famoso, the new album by sferra basta, is out worldwide for Island Records: thirteen new songs with seven international collaborations (J Balvin, Steve Aoki, 7Ari, Diplo, Offset, Future, Lil Mosey). The album, with Charlie Charles’ art direction, collects all the different sides of sferra basta; there are tracks filled with anger, hunger and desire to