These celeb-praised vape pens don’t always work
Celebrity hair stylist and owner of OUAI hair care, Jen Atkin, tried Dosist’s newly branded vape pens, and so did I.
I really wanted to try the brand Dosist after Jen praised it on her Instagram story. I went to their website, and found out that they sell their vapes via formulas: sleep, arouse, passion, bliss, calm, and relief. Dosist seems to be the first of its kind to create disposable pens that are designed to make you feel some type of way – and their packaging includes facts and tips accompanying each formula.
Do they all work, though?
That’s what I set out to figure out. They’re meant to do exactly what they say they’re going to do, but that might not fully be true.
1. Calm
I bought calm on a Monday when I was feeling particularly stressed. I had a bunch of deadlines, had to travel, and had a long list of chores I was avoiding. I needed to tf chill out. It’s a formula that “that harnesses the anti-anxiety properties of CBD coupled with the calming effects of myrcene and the balancing influences of beta-caryophyllene and limonene,” according to the brand’s website.
Before my start on Tuesday, I took two hits of calm and waited patiently for the effects.
Nothing happened.
I took another. After another few minutes, I finally started to feel something. I sank into my couch, zoned in, and banged out some work. The next few times I used Calm, I got the same results every time. That’s reliable enough for me, and the next time I am letting my anxiety get to me, I’m taking a hit of this stuff.
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2. Passion
Passion’s formula “delivers a euphoric feeling designed to increase sensuality and heighten your sexual experience,” says Dosist. I bought this one to use for a visit from a special someone aka my long distance boyfriend.
I tried smoking this before a little late night rendez-vous, and it didn’t really do what I was expecting it to do. I got supper giddy, couldn’t stop laughing, and started pretending I was an ASMR YouTuber.
Some foreplay.
While it did make sex more enjoyable during the act, it didn’t necessarily put me in the mood for the act itself. And if I’m being honest, most weed already does this. That night, we had sex because, duh, but not because of Passion.
3. Relief
When I bought Relief, I was actually post-car accident. I was hit as a pedestrian and I was in a lot of pain that pain killers just made worse. The strains I was smoking before Relief weren’t really pinpointing the things I needed relief from (my back, neck, jaw, and feet).
Relief is “designed to ease a variety of pain conditions. This formula can provide excellent relief for mild to moderate pain,” according to Dosist. That it did.
I was finally able to sleep at night without tossing and turning. I didn’t wake up 100 times just to rub my muscles and joints. My jaw and back finally relaxed. It felt like a goddamn spa day, honestly.
10/10 to Relief!
4. Bliss
Ok. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but Bliss was definitely the least effective formula.
The formula includes “uplifting terpenes such as a- and β-pinene and terpinolene,” Dosist says. It’s supposed to “help you feel just the right amount of good.” This did not really happen.
Bliss made me feel high, but it didn’t make me feel especially blissful or good. It felt like every other sativa high I’ve ever had.
Meh.
READ ALSO: I took a weed bath to relieve pain and I’m never taking a regular bath again
5. Arouse
Arouse is that good good. I mean it.
If you have trouble in the bedroom, if you sometimes have issues getting in the mood, or if you just want to have the best orgasm of your life, try Arouse. Try it alone or with your partner, it’s amazing all the same.
Whenever I’m ridin’ solo or doing a duet, I smoke Dosist now. Magical witch-like women I know have long since told me about the ever-illusive BIG. O. I finally feel as though I can achieve that goal via Arouse.
Please try this pen. Please. For the greater good of your orgasms.
READ ALSO: Marijuana can boost your workout in addition to getting you high
6. Sleep
Sleep is half-effective. The recommended dose for a Dosist pen is max 2 per hour. I felt like I had to have about 6 doses before I was feeling drowsy.
I suffer from terribly insomnia. I try the screens off rule, the lights off rule, the take a hot bath before bed trick. If I really cannot sleep, nothing really works other than smoking. The Sleep pen does work, but I don’t think that the dose is right for someone who really suffers from sleeping issues.
If you want to try Sleep, I say go for it. But, if you think it’s not working well, I recommend taking a few more doses.
Of course, everyone is different, and every body will react differently to certain strains of weed. That’s just how life is. Try out Dosist, and see for yourself which ones rock your boat.