I Bleached My Eyebrows So You Don’t Have To

Despite the appalled reactions I’ve received from literally everyone I know, I’ve decided to bleach my dark, thick eyebrows. I’ve been wanting to to do it for some time now, but the haters kept bringing me down. But when Kim Kardashian bleached hers for the Met Ball, I figured the look had reached just the level of cultural cachet necessary for me to give it a shot without my family thinking I’ve gone Girl, Interrupted. Thanks, Kim!

Other celebrities such as Cara Delevingne, Chloe Sevigny (pictured above), Miley Cyrus, Rooney Mara, and Lady Gaga have experimented with the bleached brow look in the past, and the results do range from Die-Antwoord level scary:

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To runway-appropriate on Kendall Jenner.

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Bleached eyebrows are definitely bold, but mostly I just liked the idea of a low-risk beauty move — if they get messed up, it’s really not a huge deal to dye them back — that would still effectively communicate my fierce fashion nature.

The process was easy. I visited my local CVS, purchased some Sally Hansen Creme Bleach for Face and a pint of ice cream, then headed back home to watch a Joaquin Phoenix movie and bleach my brows.

I wrangled a more beauty-savvy friend into mixing up the magic bleaching potion for me during our sleepover.

“This is going to be totally hot,” she cosigned, after I passed her the vape. “Everyone’s totally going to start copying you, in like 3 months.”

After the first 10 minute bleaching session, I wasn’t so sure. My eyebrows were lightened to a brassy orange color, which I thought was fun, but not in the way that you can like, actually go out in public with.

Bleach can irritate skin, so going completely eyebrow-blonde can often require a double process—just like your head! I waited another 24 hours, and painted a thick layer of bleach onto my eyebrows once more, leaving the mixture on for another 10 minutes. The box says only to leave the mix on for 8 minutes, but IDGAF. Clearly.

Now that I’ve done it for a second time, my eyebrows are a bright shade of pale yellow, so I’ve got to get some purple shampoo to tone down the brassiness of my brows. I might look a little wild, but I hope my eyebrows stay like this forever, and that’s what summer looks are all about, no?

Bambi (dog) isn’t a fan.


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