You’re Not a Slut, He’s Not An A**hole

As females, we’ve had a long battle with double standards sexually. While we’ve made great strides, we’ve still got a long way to go. There’s always going to be someone nagging us about our revealing attire, or judging us for our sexual choices. Sometimes it’s our mother, a jealous gal pal, or our ex-boyfriend, but there seems to be one group of guys who are always eager to call a girl a “slut.”

Who is it? The dudes who can’t get any pussy.

I’m no stranger to being called a slut. Ever since I got boobs too early and kissed one too many boys in the local mall’s movie theater, it was all downhill from there. Writing about sex on the daily clearly doesn’t help to convince anyone that I’m The Virgin Mary. There are always going to be people talking sh*t based on assumptions, guys and girls alike. I’m used to it, and I don’t let it bother me. But, do you know what does bother me? When I find that the guys talking bad about me over a cheap beer at the college bar are the same guys who were begging me to sleep with them.

Funny how sh*t works out, isn’t it? But is it that funny? If a guy actually got what he wanted from a girl, why would he talk sh*t? Granted, there are always going to be those a**holes who think they’re cool for sleeping with a new “hoe” every night and kicking them to the curb. But, it’s more likely that the guy talking smack is a guy who’s sexually frustrated and taking it out on the girl who got away. The irony in this is that he’s calling her sexually promiscuous when she wouldn’t even do anything sexual with him. But, typical guys come up with the most basic and trite insult there is, because they don’t have any better material.

I’m going to take a step back and admit that girls are faulty of this too, but in a different way. If you can find a guy who has zero girls in his past call him an a**hole, I’ll be amazed. While there are plenty of guys who 100% deserve this title, there are also plenty of girls who throw it out with the same frequency that the desperate guys say “slut.”

I hate to call out my own gender, but your naivety doesn’t make a guy an a**hole. If you decided to get drunk and approach a guy for a one-night stand, that doesn’t make him an a**hole if he doesn’t call you back, it makes him a dude. If you think a boy is sleeping with you for your personality, I can guarantee that you’re probably wrong. Did he ever tell you that he had feelings for you? Did he promise to take you out to dinner next weekend? Hell, did he even ask for your name? Or at least your Instagram?

Liars and cheaters deserve their own special circle in hell, don’t get me wrong. But having unrealistic expectations for a guy doesn’t give you the right to deem him an a**hole when he falls short.

Why can’t we accept that we’re human and we’re not all going to be perfect for each other? Instead of bitterly calling the opposite sex out when they don’t fulfill our deepest desires, why can’t we accept that the world doesn’t revolve around us? Allow your ego to be bruised instead of setting out to ruin someone’s reputation. Hell, grow the f*ck up. The world has never, and will never revolve around you. You may be the most beautiful, juiciest, tastiest peach in the world. But, there’s always going to be someone who hates peaches.

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