You Should Follow Rae Sremmurd’s Advice & Say “I Ain’t Got No Type”
While I generally would agree that you shouldn’t follow the lyrics of the latest banger you’ve been singing along to at the club, Rae Sremmurd was really onto something when they said “I ain’t got no type…bad bitches is the only thing that I like.” Albeit some grammatical issues, we should all stop telling people (and ourselves) that we have a type.
You might be reading this and thinking, Rae Sremmurd’s song bumps, but I do have a type. I always go for guys that play lacrosse, and have brown hair, and are heavy drinkers. Congratulations! You always go for the same type of dude, but why the hell do you do that? Are those the only type of guys you find attractive? Do you only pick up dudes at lacrosse tournaments? Do you search for a guy that resembles your lacrosse playing, brunette, alcoholic ex boyfriend? Moreover, are you with a guy right now? Because if you’re not, than maybe your “type” isn’t working out for you like you’d hoped.
The fact about human beings is that we never know what we actually want. I’m not talking about when your boyfriend takes you out to eat and you’re indecisive over what menu option will make you look “cool” but not fat. I’m talking about how we think we know what we want, but we actually don’t. In multiple studies of dating sites, researchers have found that even if people put specific information of what “type” of person they are looking for, they often end up dating people who don’t fall into this criteria whatsoever.
Sometimes, the guy that you’ve deemed your “type” ends up going through the “unicorn effect.” What’s the unicorn effect, you ask? It’s when you build somebody up in your head and then when you actually get to be with them, you are unfortunately let down. I used to be like this with bad boys. I loved the tattoos, piercings, tight black jeans and DGAF attitude. I loved that they were always drinking and smoking and skipping class. Even today, if I see a dude with long hair and full-sleeves, I probably think he’s sexy as fuck. Yet, I know that once the initial attraction is gone, that dude is probably not for me. I’m really not down to date a guy who spends his time skateboarding instead of working, and the thought of bringing home a dude with full-body tats home to my parents sounds like a nightmare.
When I show my friends the guy that I’m currently dating and they say that he doesn’t look like my “type,” I know that they’re wrong. Because I don’t limit myself to having one type, my type is the kind of guy I am attracted to and who treats me right. If you’re “sick of men” because you’re sick of them all fucking you over, maybe you need to branch out of the typical kinds of guys you go for. Chances are, if every single frat bro that you’ve been sleeping with is fucking you over, maybe it’s time to try dating a different type of dude. Not that you can generalize somebody so quickly by their looks and/or activities, but you can’t deny that there’s a big difference between dating a football player and dating a competitive chess player. By dating somebody outside your usual realm of romantic options, you allow yourself to grow with your relationship. If you always date DJs, you probably know everything there is to know about EDM and dance clubs and can stay up till 5 am no problem. By dating a dude in finance next, you can explore a whole new world (no Aladdin pun intended).
Instead of crossing somebody off your mental list of potential boos because he doesn’t watch American Horror Story, give people a chance. Would you be happy if people judged you based on your looks and reputation before they got to know you? Probably not. And to quote the wise words of Rae Sremmurd again…
She said, “Whats your type?”
I said, “I like what I like!”
All Photos from BET