What It’s Really Like To Date A Sugar Daddy
With the rising costs of everything, from college tuition, rent and even concert tickets, financial strain is definitely a real threat to millennials.
Trying not to drown in bills isn’t the easiest task, and that’s why sites like SeekingArrangement.com and Sugarbabies.com have become quite popular. On these sites, young women, especially those in college or those who’ve recently graduated, can meet and date men who actually want to help them out… financially. Collectively, these men are known as sugar daddies.
What’s the world of a sugar baby like? We chatted with sugar baby extraordinaire, Candice Kashani, about her experiences with daddies and all of their sweets treats.
Galore: To start off, what’s the best part about being a sugar baby?
Candice Kashani: I think the aspect of having a nice, drama-free relationship where I’m also getting financial assistance is the best perk. But there are so many. The level of maturity in our relationship is great, there’s no bullshit, and I get to experience so many places.
Drama-free is good, but do you ever feel that it’s hard to avoid being dramatic?
CK: Um, there’s been some moments where I’m like “Ugh, he’s really annoying me right now” or I’m just really agitated for some reason. You kind of just learn to handle things like a grown up. I’ve talked to my mom about this before and she said, “You know, in the workforce there are gonna be people who annoy you, but you can’t have fits and temper tantrums. You have to learn how to deal with someone who has a very busy schedule.”
So your parents are pretty open with it? Seems like your mom is?
CK: Yeah, my mom’s been pretty open to it. She didn’t really know what it was about, so I had to explain it to her. But now she thinks it’s pretty normal. I feel like it’s not any different than when a guy takes care of his wife and she’s a stay at home mom, or something like that. My dad has nothing to do with my dating life at all — he’s an out of sight, out of mind kind of person.
In your opinion, what’s too drastic of an age gap?
CK: That’s a personal thing. For me, I’d say 15 years is the max because a guy needs to be in his late 30s or 40s for me to be physically attracted to him. My sugar daddy just turned 40 a few weeks ago and I’m 26, so that’s a 14 year difference. But there are girls who are perfectly fine being with someone who is significantly older as long as they’re comfortable and happy. To each their own.
Right right. What do you do in a situation where your current daddy is gifting you nicely but you’d prefer he help you financially, like help pay for college. What’s the best way to bring that issue up?
CK: I totally had my last school tuition paid for. I think it’s easier for daddies to give money towards something like a career goal or education purposes where they know the money is going towards something worthwhile, rather than plastic.
How do you benefit from sugar daddies professionally?
CK: I think you can definitely use it as a networking tool if you want to, especially with arrangements that have maybe already ended. If there is common ground but the door closed on an arrangement, I see no need to cut ties completely. You never know when you’re going to need to reach out to someone someday for a networking opportunity so yeah, you could definitely use that to your advantage.
What’s the best date you’ve ever been on through Seeking Arrangement?
CK: I would say my first date with the guy I’m with right now. He lives in Chicago and I live in the suburbs of Philadelphia, so we texted and Skyped for a little bit before meeting and then he suggested I come to Chicago for a weekend and said he’d put me up in a hotel and everything. Once there, he took me to a really nice restaurant and then for drinks. At one point prior when we were talking, he had asked what my favorite colors were and I thought he was just trying to make conversation. But then on our date he brought me jewelry with cute little gemstones on it in my favorite colors. I thought it was really thoughtful that he had gone out of his way to take the time to go shopping for me. It also just made it so much more magical because I was really nervous going in.
I have to ask, what’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
CK: Probably my Chanel bags and Louboutins. I have about 12 paris of Louboutins!
Would you ever go back to traditional dating?
CK: [Laughing] Probably not… I like where I’m at.
Have you ever fallen in love with a sugar daddy?
CK: That’s actually funny because I was in Chicago about a week and a half ago and he told me he loved me for the first time.
Aww… and that’s the first time that’s happened through Seeking Arrangement?
CK: Well, this is the first time I’ve been in an arrangement this long. The others have been for like 4 to 6 months and I feel like that would have been too soon to tell someone they love them. There wasn’t really a chance for that, but with him, we’ve been together for about 10 months now.
Does distance ever make it hard or does living in different cities ever make it hard?
CK: It’s harder because you need to plan things in advance or plan to see each other on a weekend where you’re both free. He travels sometimes for work, so I get to go with him. I kind of preferred to find a guy that was in either in New York or Chicago, which is kind of the same distance just because I didn’t want to have a situation where there would be a conflict of interest in my own city, so I thought it’d be easier.
I’m sure it also helps keep the drama out of the relationship… or keeps you focused on your own life.
CK: Right, there’s that separation there.
Have you ever met one of your sugar daddy’s children?
CK: None of the guys I’ve been with have had kids, so it hasn’t really come up for me. I imagine that if someone is divorced or separated and that there are kids in the mix, that it would probably flow naturally and perhaps take a while. Just like in traditional dating, you don’t want to expose your children to someone if you know they’re not going to be a permanent person in your life.
What’s the biggest criticism you’ve gotten from friends or family and how do you respond?
CK: I think the biggest criticism I get is when people mistakenly compare this to prostitution and that’s very different because that’s just sexual in nature and this is not. I have a relationship with this person, I know a lot about him. We have an emotional and physical side. It’s not like prostitution, which is solely transactional.