8 Ways To Have Better Sex In Your Dorm Room
1. Establish A Code With Your Roomie
Nothing kills the mood– or ruins your roomie relationship-like your new housemate walking in on you getting pounded from behind. If you plan on having sex in your room, make sure to warn your roommate ahead of time, and try to be courteous. If it’s possible to get boned while she’s in class, do that rather than having your booty call come over at 2 am the night before her Bio exam.
2. Master The Modified Doggy Style
While the classic positions are generally feasible on your twin sized bed, some can get tricky. Depending on the exact size of your bed and how high your ceilings are, doggy style can be a hit or miss. Instead of getting on all fours in your questionable bed, try standing up and bending over the bed using your forearms as leverage.
3. Watch Your Windows
You know how lots of freshman put “cute” wall decals on their dorm room windows so that passerbys can see? Yeah, that’s because dorm-room windows are visible to everybody. Specifically, if you’re having sex with your blinds open on a Friday night with your lights on. If you’re into exhibitionism, sweet. But if you’re not? You might want to make sure to close your blinds before you get drunk and decide to get freaky.
4. Lock Your Door
Even if you have established ground rules with your roomie, better safe than sorry. Nothing wrong with locking the door in case your roommate, floor mate, or RA decide to stop in. Bonus points if your roomie’s parents are here visiting and they walk in on you giving head.
5. Find An Older Dude Instead
The best way to have sex in your dorm room? Don’t. Instead of hooking up with your floor mate, which will inevitably end up in awkward encounters, hook up with an upperclassman who actually has his own apartment. You may be doing lots of walk of shames in the morning, but at least you won’t have to sleep two people in a tiny ass bed.
6. Remember To Learn His Last Name
The worst thing about going home with a dude who lives in a dorm isn’t attempting to sleep comfortably in his Toy Story sheets or avoiding his creepy roommate while you fuck, it’s having to “sign out” in the morning. If you go home with a rando and have to sign out to get your ID card, not only is the front desk lady judging you for wearing last night’s dress, but she’s especially judging you when she asks you whose room you were in and you can’t even recall his name.
7. Move Your Bed Accordingly
Whoever planned your dorm rooms obviously didn’t account for your boning sessions. Your bed is probably awkwardly positioned close to the wall, but not actually quite against the wall. This will result in your bed banging against the wall every time your dude thrusts, possibly waking your whole floor, and definitely killing the mood. If possible, try to move your bed either against the wall, or far enough away that it won’t bang against the wall while you’re getting busy.
8. Don’t Loft Your Beds
It’s hard enough to get up to your top bunk after a night of drinking, it’s even tougher when there are two drunk people trying to get into it. Just say no to lofted beds. Sure, there’s “so much more room for activities,” but none of those activities include fucking.