Vera Wang Unveils New Line Of Bad Bitch Bridal Gowns

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Everything about getting married is strange. After dating someone for a while and deciding that it’s been going like, out-of-this-world-well, you and your beloved decide you just want to keep doing this for like, ever.

So one of you drops a thousand or two to buy a ring so that he/she can drop down to one knee and hopefully start a process of continued exorbitant spending that cumulates in a big, public party to celebrate your personal, intimate love story.

The big party part? Cool. Some people will be miserable, but parties have a way of bringing that out in people. Spending who knows how much money on some frilly white dress you’ll never wear again? Dumb move.

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Turns out, Vera Wang thinks so too.  While the idea of a Vera Wang wedding dress probably conjures up an image of an American cupcake in Spring, the designer’s new collection for Spring 2016 (yes, it’s ridiculous the line is coming out a year in advance, but that’s bridal for you) is surprisingly see-through.

And very dark in a ‘the brides look like they’ve had a few drinks and stayed up all night and took a shower to try and stay awake, but let’s be honest, they really don’t care about this photo shoot right now’ kind of way.

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While it’s hard to imagine your best friend from high school pulling one of these gowns off the rack and proclaiming she just found her dream dress, maybe that’s the point.

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After all, if nobody wants to be a basic b*tch when they’re single, why should they suddenly give all that up once they decide to get married?  Just please do everybody in your wedding party a favor and please remember to wear underwear.

Even bad b*tches wear G-strings.

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