The Shacker Survival Guide: Looking Good The Morning After

It’s Saturday Morning and you’re hung-over. You blink open your eyes and quickly realize that you’re not at home and there is a man sprawled out next to you. You have a couple choices:

a) Quietly get out of bed, get dressed, and catch the next cab back to your place

b) Pretend to be asleep until he wakes up and gage your reaction on his behavior

c) Wake him up yourself with some morning sex

d) Wake him up (with or without morning sex) casually, and agree to go to breakfast with him (assuming he asks, in attempts to be a gentleman)

(No Clue how to act the morning after? Click Here)


Now, while I’m always a believer of choosing option C (can’t think of a better way to start your day), I know many chicks that end up with option D. This varies based on the type of girl you are, but unfortunately, once you start liking someone, it’s hard to pry yourself out from their bed (and arms). Due to this fact, your “adult sleepover” can turn into a whole weekend pretty quickly.

However, this becomes a problem not only because you are becoming a clinger, but also because your hygiene can go completely out the window. Never fear, because I am providing you with all the tools you need for your next shacker Sunday (or any other day of the week for that matter, because sex doesn’t take the week off).


1.Wet Wipes/Makeup Remover: These are pretty crucial. I ideally like to take my makeup off before bed, but if it’s a new guy in my life I might save the sight of me “au natural” for a little later on in the flirtationship. However, even if you keep your makeup on, you’re going to wake up with smeared eye shadow that may or may not also be on his pillows. Therefore, some maintenance with makeup wipes in the morning is crucial. We love Simple Skincare Wipes.


2. Perfume: I know you have some of those store sample bottles somewhere on your vanity, these are perfect to store in your purse to erase the smell of alcohol and bad decisions (or at least mask it). We are currently obsessed with Diesel’s Loverdose. Don’t hesitate to snoop into his medicine cabinet and steal some of his deodorant (men’s works way better anyways!)


3. Cheeki: There are so many reasons why having an extra pair of CLEAN panties in your purse is genius. Because even the classiest of us run the risk of losing our panties in the mess that are guys’ rooms. While you could always just throw an extra pair in your purse, Cheeki is nicely packaged and discreet so that you don’t run the risk of flinging your thong across the bank next time you’re digging in your purse.


4.Some form of teeth cleaning: This is up to your personal preference, but nothing bothers me more than not being able to brush my teeth in the morning, especially after a night of drinking and possibly having someone’s sweaty genitals in or around my mouth. While you don’t want to be the bitch that brings her toothbrush to a casual hook-ups house (that’s a serious red flag), you don’t want to have stank breath either. Be it gum, mouthwash, or those little on-the-go toothbrushes they had for a while (rip, slip, brush- ahhh), be prepared.


5. Hair Tie: I always wear one on my wrist for convenience, although I know it might not be the trendiest look in the world. However, if your hair is like mine, it looks like a birds nest in the morning. If you’re also like me, you will date guys who somehow do not own any form of hairbrush. Therefore, you’re going to have to make it work with your hands and a hair tie, I’m sure there’s some YouTube tutorial to help you out. If you want to be trendier than me with my basic black rubber band, check out these Emi_Jay hair-ties that are as cute as they are practical.


You’re probably wondering why I haven’t mentioned anything about clothes, but let’s be honest, bring anymore shit and you’re going to run the risk of looking like you’re going on a camping trip. Besides, that sequined mini is going to look just as great in broad daylight- and now everyone can really see how it accents your ass! (Stop Calling it a Walk of Shame anyways) In reality you may not even be able to fit the five items I listed in your tiny, going-out clutch, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. At the end of the day, guys hygiene is usually shit anyways, so they probably won’t notice if you go without brushing your teeth for 12 hours.

Gimme More Sex + Dating

Do You Like?

Some things are only found on Facebook. Don't miss out.