The Pumpkin Spice Latte May Be Basic, But It’s Better At Twitter Than You
In an effort to disappoint us even more than it usually does, last year Fall decided to begin its reign of terror in August by hooking up its favorite disciple, the Pumpkin Spice Latte, with its very own Twitter account. While everybody knows that bitches love Pumpkin Spice Lattes even more than they love Beyonce , it was unclear how the Pumpkin Spice Latte’s popularity would translate to Twitter. Unsurprisingly, the answer was very well. While most of our first tweets probably had about 0 to 1 likes, the Pumpkin Spice Latte’s first tweet not only had 116 likes, but it had 90 retweets.
I’m the real Pumpkin Spice Latte. These are my tweets. 🍂☕️🍂
— Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) August 4, 2014
A mere four days later, the Pumpkin Spice Latte was getting 677 retweets and 805 likes on posts, although I think we can all agree that the #IWokeUpLikeThis move was a cheap trick, because as we already stated, the only thing bitches love more than Beyonce is PSLs.
In fact, the Pumpkin Spice Latte is so popular on Twitter that it actually has a verified account – and it’s literally not a real person, so that’s really saying something.
Proud to be the first ~verified~ sunglasses-wearing latte on Twitter. Orange is my color but that blue checkmark looks 👌 — Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) September 17, 2015
So what exactly does a Pumpkin Spice Latte have to tweet about? As it turns out, a lot. The Pumpkin Spice Latte has tweeted 12.5K times in the past year. Since last August it’s come out as a big Iggy Azalea fan:
— Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) August 7, 2014
Mastered the art of selfie taking:
— Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) September 5, 2014
Written an advice column:
— Pumpkin Spice Latte (@TheRealPSL) October 21, 2014
And still managed to find the time to relax by lighting scented candles and binge-watching Gilmore Girls:
But most of the time, the Pumpkin Spice Latte is just keeping it real and tweeting inspiring messages and heart-eyed emojis to its 116K followers.
While I never thought I’d ever see the day where I became jealous of an inanimate object, on a scale of 1 to Lana Del Rey, I’m incredibly sad that the Pumpkin Spice Latte is, and always will be, way better at Twitter than I ever will. But who knows, maybe if I ask really, really nicely, the Pumpkin Spice Latte will agree to run my Twitter account for me. A girl can dream.