A guy called me a hoe on Instagram, so I told his mom
This girl got called a hoe by some random guy on Instagram, and she told his mom about it.
You heard me!
Victoria Nelson is a 24-year-old digital talent manager from LA. A while ago, she got paid to create Instagram posts for a swimwear brand, which she said turned her social media into a “side hustle.” Instead of her Instagram being more private for just family and friends, her page became more public than she expected.
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One day, Victoria woke up to a shocking comment from a total stranger on one of her photos saying, “Representing yourself as a total hoe. Congrats on 5K! Bahaha.”
Victoria couldn’t shake the comment, so she decided to take some action.
“I chose to screenshot the comment and post it on my story,” she said. “I included his handle and voiced my concern that he believed this type of behavior was acceptable.” And she’s right. We’re conditioned as young adults that cyberbullying is a part of life and growing up, but honestly, it’s totally avoidable. Just don’t be a douche. No one should be posting hateful comments online, especially not past the seventh grade.
It wasn’t the stranger’s comment that really upset her, it was more so the idea that he thought it was appropriate at all.
“I’m too strong to let a complete stranger make me think poorly of myself,” Victoria said. “But, I wanted to stand in solidarity and prove that there are consequences to your actions. You can’t just hide behind a computer screen.”
And probably the most frustrating part about negative comments made online is the fact that they are one-sided. It’s not a real discussion when someone is just shooting out quick, mean comments at you. It’s not real, making it even more annoying to deal with.
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Victoria didn’t stop there, though. She decided to find Zac’s mom through Facebook (good ol’ fb) to tell her what her son said.
“I chose to send her a message explaining that if either of my brothers behaved the way her son was behaving, my mother would want to know,” she said. “She didn’t raise them to treat women, or people for that matter, this way.”
Even though the mother never responded, it took a lot of balls to go to her with the concern in the first place.
Maybe his mother scolded him or maybe she dissed Victoria along with him. We will never know for sure. What matters, though, is the fact that for the most part, men are still being raise to believe that harassment is tolerated.
Truth be told, it doesn’t matter what kinds of photos you, or Victoria, post on social media. It’s your body and your choice. That’s the whole point of it, it’s autonomy. You wanna post a full frontal like Kim K? Go for it! You want to dress in a fully covered, head-to-toe modest look? Yes, please!
Do you and don’t let the losers behind their screens get you down about it. And when those negative people come around? Shut them down. Shame them right back for behaving like children, like Victoria did.
As a woman who also puts herself out there on social media, I am too familiar with these kinds of comments. It’s 2018, and it’s time to stop overlooking and excusing online harassment. If women get harassing comments on Instagram, we’re told to ignore it. But what would happen if we backed each other and called these bullies tf out?
