The Real Reason You Shouldn’t Have Sex On The First Date


All dating etiquette of our parent’s generation has been explicitly thrown out the window long ago (probably somewhere between sexting and Tinder).

You have sex before you start dating, you know a guys dating history before you’ve even met him in person, it’s weird as hell and our grandparents would probably shit their pants if they knew half of the shit we are doing with the opposite sex (I don’t think rim jobs were quite as common in the 40s, but who knows?).

One thing that it seems a reasonable amount of girls cling on to is the rule that they won’t have sex with a guy on the first date. Granted, in this generation the word “date” comes very loosely.

Instead of saying “I’ve never had sex on the first date” it would make more sense to say “I’ve never had sex with a guy after meeting him for the first time.” Because let’s be real, your first “date” with your boo probably involved a bar, tequila shots, and bad decisions.

Regardless, I’ll have my guy friends complain to me that they don’t see why girls will hold off on f*cking them after one or two dates. They try to explain to me that holding out on sex isn’t going to make them like the chicks more.

However, I’m well aware of this, and if you’re still one of those girls who thinks that withholding sex to make a guy “fall for you” is going to work, you need to get your head out of your ass. I know guys who will wine and dine a girl for 7 f*cking dates, and as soon as they get in their pants, they dip out.

It blows hard, but dudes are sneaky little bastards and they know how to get what they want. Which brings me to the point that you should get what you want when it comes to sex. If you want to f*** a guy on the first date, don’t let backwards rules of “being ladylike” get in your way.

But the real reason I don’t believe in having sex on the first date is because in my opinion, casual sex kind of blows.

Sure, guys will say “sex is like pizza, even if it’s bad- it’s still pretty good.” Maybe it’s because I’m a girl, but I disagree. The best sex I’ve had is 100% in long term relationships, and it’s not because I happen to date guys who are Casanova’s in the bedroom.

It’s because the longer you’re with someone, the more comfortable you are with them, and the more likely they are to know what you like in bed.

Remember that episode in Sex and The City where Samantha finds out her dude has a really small dick and is super upset about it? Yeah, that’s kind of what will happen when you decide to have sex with a random dude and realize it’s not all you thought it would be.

Sex might have become super casual and impersonal in our society, but that doesn’t mean it should be bad. Hell, if it’s bad, why the hell would you be having it? I’m not saying don’t f*ck a dude on the first “date,” and I’m not saying that you should vow to never have casual sex again.

But, if you want to get your mind-blown in the bed, take a step back and think about how you’re going to get there.

(P.S. it’s not by taking random dudes home every night)

Gimme More Sex + Dating

Do You Like?

Some things are only found on Facebook. Don't miss out.