Why Your Relationship Can Get Better if You Agree to Disagree
It’s easy to give someone relationship advice, but it’s not quite as easy to follow it yourself.
For example, you probably tell your friend who constantly argues with her bae about politics that they need to agree on shit or else they’ll continue fighting about it and eventually break up.
Well, that’s where you’re kind of wrong.
In fact, contrary to popular belief, not coming to an agreement in every argument is actually good for your relationship.
John Gottman, a professor of psychology who has been studying relationships for over 40 years, found the most successful couples were actually the ones who have unresolved issues they’ve fought over for decades, explains Business Insider in their recent article.
Isn’t that insane?
You would totally assume that communicating and finding agreement on issues would make you a stronger couple, but somehow, it doesn’t. Sometimes it’s better to agree to disagree instead of beating a dead horse.
Gottman has found in his research that the couples who insisted on solving everything actually ended up breaking up and/or divorcing eventually.
Really makes you think, doesn’t it?
Story continue below…
Maybe the fact you and your bae constantly fight over if you should keep the cereal boxes in the pantry or on top of the fridge just means your relationship is stronger?
Obviously, there are exceptions to this rule, and if you and your boo are always arguing about whether sending sexts is cheating or not, then it’s probably not “good for your relationship.” Don’t let Gottman’s research justify you staying with a shitty partner.
But at the same time, don’t think your relationship is doomed if you and your boo keep arguing about random dumb shit. It’s okay to not agree on everything as long as you don’t disrespect each other while arguing.