New Year’s Resolutions Are Just Last Year’s Expectations And Here’s Why
Going into this year, at this time last year, I had a lot of expectations. I’m sure we all did. Every time one year comes to a close, we’re looking at the next with hopes probably too big to stomach, and we partake in a tradition as spiritfully naive as leaving cookies out for Santa on Christmas Eve, claiming all the things we’re either going to start, or stop doing come the new year. You’re definitely going to start working out again this year, right? Oh, and start eating healthy, and bust out all those new projects you’ve been meaning to, and take more “me” time while you’re at it.
At this time last year, I promised I wouldn’t let my heart be broken again. Ironically, the same boy came back to gather even more pieces, and I let him scrape even the smallest corners off the ground for his own personal collection.
At this time last year, the right to marry was still an obstacle for some of my dear friends. The summer solace of June finally brought a rainbow of hope to all the boys who wanted to walk down the aisle towards the boy that they loved, and all the girls who wanted their dream wedding with the girl of their dreams. It brought hope to those who loved who they wanted to love.
At this time last year, I thought graduating college would mark some sort of milestone, something that would entice change. However, I discovered milestones can only entice such a thing if they are turned over quickly and the next is vigorously being carved out.
At this time last year, Paris was a city of love. Paris had yet to be soiled by innocent blood shed for a war it didn’t know it was in, and we had yet to send our fervent prayers for it’s restoration.
At this time last year, I didn’t think I’d actually be able to make it on my own, despite my unabashed claims that I would. Yet, I’m surviving. There is a roof, there are four walls, there is pride in what I’m working on for myself.
We go into every year searching for the same thing: Please let this year be better than last year. I’ve heard the plea even from those I admire as “successful” individuals. Expectations are filthy gambles. Sometimes our blinded bet is met with a reward we never would have imagine, and other times it’s met with crushing disappointments, and we have to rebuild ourselves from the blow. Goals are based on the future, expectations are based on the past. Closing the door to last year’s expectations of this year is the biggest resolution any of us can have. Let this year, and all the pain and the joy and the confusion and the uncertainty that it brought with it finally resolve itself, and you might find that peace always rides patiently alongside, waiting for its debut.