Is There A Correlation Between Catcalling And Small Balls?

The thing about research studies is you can really take anything out of them that you like. It’s easy to be mislead by a generalized scientific hypothesis, or coerced by a study with a tiny sample size. However, when you find scientific evidence that you want to believe is true? There’s no reason not to have faith in its accuracy. This is exactly how we felt when we came across this study on the howler monkey.

The howler monkey is one of the loudest species on the planet. Like many animals (not humans), the howler monkey attracts mates by their calls. However, an interesting finding was discovered about the howler monkey recently. The correlation was discovered that the louder the monkey, the smaller the balls.

What could contribute to this relationship? One of the researchers, Jacob Dunn, explains that:

It may be that investment in developing a large vocal organ and roaring is so costly that there is simply not enough energy left to invest in testes. Alternatively, using a large vocal organ for roaring may be so effective at deterring rival males that there is no need to invest in large testes.

Hm…why does this over-compensating sound so familiar? Kind of like your ex-boyfriend who drank protein powder like it was water and had to obnoxiously roar his engine whenever he was at a stoplight because of his unusually small penis? Or maybe your misogynistic cousin that stands at a meager 5’4 and has to constantly post embarrassing anti-feminist Facebook statuses?

While it’s pretty unlikely that every cat-caller ain’t packing where it counts, we can’t deny that monkeys are one of mankind’s closest relatives. However, while howler monkeys get their nut from their loud calls, the human male usually gets quite the opposite.

Gimme More Sex + Dating

Do You Like?

Some things are only found on Facebook. Don't miss out.