How to be less petty
It’s been two months since you made your New Year’s resolutions and you’ve been dying to make a fresh start. Although it’s not easy to make some changes overnight, some old mentalities don’t die hard. If there’s one thing that defined 2017, it’s being petty.
In that case, I’m talking about salty shades, catty clapbacks, crassy complaints and extreme hatred. As much as we want to applaud ourselves for venting our feelings about certain events in our life in a public space, it’s not cool for our pettiness to be celebrated.
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Letting go is not easy, but can we make the journey to wholly new enlightened less challenging? Yes, ma’am! Here are my tips on how to move on without being a bunch of sour grapes:
1. Forgive and forget
You and one of your ex-BFFs used to be tight until she did something bad. You wanted to find out why, but there was no answer. You’ve been angry at her to the point where you never want to forgive her. When she wants to reconcile the friendship by texting you incessantly, you still refuse to share your olive branch.
Rather than continually ignoring her like you’d ignore an ex, just text her back! Even though it’s so awkward to put yourself in a situation where you don’t want to show your vulnerability, spill your heart out! Remember: treat forgiveness like it’s a bottle of pixie dust.
If Paris Hilton can make nice with Kim Kardashian, you can do it, too!
2. Victory does not equal playing the victim card
If you’ve landed into a first degree-level burn of drama, don’t try to add more fuel to the fire. When you think that everyone wronged you, give yourself a reality check before you pull out the victim card as being the Taylor Swift of your friend group is not cute.
Honey, it’s time to stop being the Regina George in sheep’s clothing and grow the eff up.
3. Clapback only when necessary
Standing up for yourself is a value I firmly believe in. But, is it necessary to be constantly defensive over the littlest jabs? Dust yourself off and never fall for the bait.
4. Don’t be so drastic
When you want to get yourself out of a bad sitch, deciding between your way vs. the highway is not the wisest choice. Case in point:
A few years ago, I used to be friends with a colleague from my internship at a music management/record label. We hung out at concerts, where we danced, filmed every show and drank Coors Lights. Despite the fact that we had some fun, our personalities clashed as I felt that he was being too bossy and controlling. Out of the blue, I decided to end our friendship by avoiding him at school. He got extremely pissed about it and confronted me via text. Looking back, it was one of the stupidest things I ever did.
If you want to end a toxic friendship, SAY IT! Don’t ignore and pretend that she or he doesn’t even exist on this planet.
5. Jealousy is misery’s new BFF
Your friend just got a new boyfriend. You wish you can be happy for her, but you rant on Twitter about it because you want one yourself. A bougie family friend got a new Gucci handbag from her parents for Christmas and you secretly wanna swipe it from her so that you can use it for your next #ootd shot. Your roomie got a new job at your favorite boutique, which triggers you to cry on your freshly delivered Pad Thai noodles from Postmates.
You feel like the entire world is against you. You want the world to be fair with you because all of your dreams have yet to come true. Plus, you can’t be happy for yourself even though you scored a 4.0 GPA. Ask yourself: what do you have that they don’t have?
I know this sounds like a platitude, but be PROUD of yourself! OWN your confidence and be unapologetic about it. After all, don’t you want to be the friend that is willing to ride and die? Or, be the roomie that’s going to become her future BFF? Chillax and let the saltiness air itself out.