The Hottest Guys Playing in the 2016 Super Bowl
The Super Bowl is a unique experience every year. Some years, you’re cuddled up on the couch with your boyfriend chugging a shitty beer. Some years, you’re painting your nails and waiting for the commercials to come on so you can see Kim Kardashian talk about selfies.
The one constant every year, though, is that football players are hot af.
If you want to be able to cleverly discuss football in front of your brother’s hot friends, this article won’t help you. But if you want to know which sexy players to look out for during the game, we’ve got your back.
The Carolina Panthers
Greg Olsen, Tight End
We love tight ends, because it’s the best football position for making sexual puns. Not to mention that Greg Olsen has that whole lumber-sexual thing going on. If you watched the game last night, you’d have seen his beard in full force atop that rugged and sweaty face that just got done whoopin’ some Arizona ass.
Luke Kuechly, Linebacker
Look at that baby face! There’s nothing better than a cute face on a big football-er body. Naturally, after Luke’s big touchdown last night a fan ended up falling out of the stands in excitement. Sweetheart Luke made sure to check on him before continuing his celebration.
Cam Newton, Quarterback
How is it that the quarterbacks are always the cutest? If you’re not swooning over his impressive record-breaking maneuvers, you can catch him in his current Beats by Dre commercials where he basically owns all of his haters.
Kurt Coleman, Safety
Just make sure that if you’re going to look up more photos of Kurt Coleman after this, you specify “Kurt Coleman NFL.” Turns out there’s another Kurt Coleman who’s an Instagram celebrity that’s obsessed with spray tans…
The Denver Broncos
Brock Osweiler, Quarterback
If you were a “Twilight” fan who obsessed over Robert Pattinson, you’re sure to love Brock Osweiler because their resemblance is uncanny. The only difference is that Brock is not a vampire, and unlike Edward’s scrawny ass, Brock is v athletic. Seems like a win-win in our book.
Emmanuel Sanders, Wide Receiver
He may be married, but that won’t stop us from staring at the Broncos’ adorable wide receiver. Although he’s perfecting the pout in this photo, he looks equally adorable when busting out a big grin.
Brandon McManus, Placekicker
What’s a placekicker do? Place… kicks? That’s not important because Brandon McManus looks sexy and pensive while pondering his placekicker activities, doesn’t he?
Omar Bolden, Safety
His hair may be longer than mine and he may have already Instagrammed about three times since his team won their conference, but his smile and his swag are contagious.