9 Struggles Every Girl Faces Before Bikini Season
I’m freezing my ass off in NYC, but that doesn’t mean that the rest of the states feel like my soul. If you’re smart enough to escape this dreadfully cold weather then packing and making sure you don’t get too drunk and miss your flight in the morning are not your only concerns.
There are two feared words in the English dictionary for every girl after winter and they are “pool party”. Here are some of the struggles every girl faces before diving into her bronze bod:
Pizza, sandwiches, beer, bread in general, go right on your list of do not f***ing consume. This is the time to find out which one of your friends are gluten free and live with them for a week. Okay, you don’t really have to live with them, but definitely pick up some of their habits if you want to look extra fire in your swim suit.
2. Dressing Rooms With Florescent Lighting
These are the worst. You go in, change into whatever the hell you managed to pick out, and then bam. The lighting is so harsh that you have to look twice just to make sure you’re not starring at a pregnant Kim Kardashian in the reflection.
3. Late Dinners
Your friends who are braving out the cold and not vacationing with you will only ask one: to join them at dinner at 11 p.m. But growing up we all learned that eating before you want to pass out in bed is a major no. You’ll get major FOMO, sure, but it’ll be worth it when you’re tanning on the beach.
4. Juice Diet
All juice erryything. Organic Avenue and Juice Press just became your new hot spots. No more Chipotle, taco Tuesday, nothing. I mean it.
An absolute f***ing must, but beware of doing this too close to your departure date. If things go wrong down under, you may have to buy a pair of board shorts and pretend you’re surfing all weekend. Maybe you’ll meet a hot surfer though.
6. Finding The Perfect Bikini
Everyone wants the hottest bikini that no one else has. Because let’s face it, if you show up to the beach or pool party and some bitch stole your look- only one girl will win. And you don’t want to be the loser.
7. Fake Eyelashes
I haven’t tried this, but I know some girlfriends who have gotten their eyelash game on so they can ditch the mascara and splash around all they want.
8. Drunk Eating
It’s a trap! This will bring you back 101 steps if drunk you decides to get pizza at 3 a.m. Old habits die hard, but this one will ruin your work.
Making sure to throw in some cardio to get your bum and calf muscles in tip top shape is also a vital key. And if you don’t have a gym membership, it’s okay. Running down the train steps, running after a cab, walking to work, chasing an ex-boyfriend, dancing in high heels at the club, will all get you the same result.
So as much as it may suck not being able to hide under your oversized sweaters and leggings, you’ll feel much better when you’re the hottest girl on the beach. And not being mistaken for the beached whale.