5 Faces Of Artemisia #300

By now most of us have seen the new 300: Rise of An Empire movie, having been released to public audiences this past Friday. If you have not seen it, you have most likely stumbled across its GIFs on Tumblr, read a review or two in the news, or overheard the either ecstatic or disappointed ravings that have been spouting non stop from the mouths of Zack Snyder followers and comic book fan-boys and girls alike. If you have heard or seen any of the above, you have been introduced to the glorious, fictionalized historical figure that is Artemisia.

The Greek, turned Persian naval commander is almost unanimously the brightest spot in an otherwise dismally colored movie. A traumatized child who rose through the ranks of the Persian army to become the deadliest thing on the Aegean sea is a pretty inspiring story on its own, but the mix of horror and lust that Eva Green inspires through her portrayal of this character is unparalleled. Beautiful, deadly and skilled in sword fight all while wearing the sort of armor that would make the Couturiers of today swoon. If you haven’t fallen in love with her yet, here are the five faces of Artemisia that will change your mind.

She is a manipulative genius
When we are introduced to Artemisia, she is described by Queen Gorgo as someone who’s “deadliness is only matched by her beauty”. That becomes pretty clear as the tall, dark haired figure with the deep set blue eyes strolls across the screen in a full length, fringed body armor and then proceeds to “whisper the seed of madness” into Xerxes’s ear.

Inspiring naval commander
She is an eloquent speaker on par with Leonidas from the original 300 movie. The point when she is beginning to realize that the Athenians could indeed pose a threat to her navy is riveting enough to make the viewer wish they could take up arms just to impress this golden garbed military savant. How shitty must her men feel when she reveals that even though she “stands among ten thousand, [she is] alone”. Guess they weren’t as good at fighting as they were at painting their abs.

She is sexy
Artemisia is by far the sexiest thing in a movie filled with hundreds of half naked men. Her piercing glare, the ferocity with which she delivers her killing blow, is R rated erotic. The violent sex scene between her and her Athenian rival Themistocles? Porn, baby. Straight. Up. Porn. As she begins stripping of her low cut, golden hemmed gown, you begin to wonder how Themistocles is going to maintain his military professionalism in the face of such deadly flesh. Artemisia is all of our woman crush Wednesdays.

She is Terrifying
Despite the many scenes of Artemisia beheading her attackers, making out with severed heads, and even choking Themistocles in the midst of f***ing him, the most terrifying image we have of Artemisia is when she arrives, dirty faced in front of King Darius, clutching the corpse heads of two unknown Greeks.

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She is a warrior
From her spiked spinal armor, to the way she wields her two swords, there is not a moment throughout the movie when Artemisia isn’t inspiring either respect, terror or envy from both her fellow characters and her viewers. She is a fighter through and through, from the moment she watches her village burning and her mother’s rape to minute when she holds her blade against Themistocles’ throat. There is a scene where Xerxes strikes her cheek in kingly rage and demands her respect and fealty. Her response? “Do not forget who put the crown on your childish head” is both demeaning and dignified. A true warrior, bows to no one. Artemisia, we are kneeling at your feet.


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